Stir in the Air (Original)

in #story7 years ago (edited)

giphy-26.gif

I was the wind rustling through your hair,
sampling the cold room wrapped about you,
I was never really sure I was there.

Scattered from your window to everywhere,
stretched infinitely thin under the stars,
I was the wind rustling through your hair.

Now when I dream I imagine you fair
but you have no body, you're only wind.
I was never really sure I was there.

giphy-21.gif

The universe groans before settling,
then all the world's actors rush to the stage,
I was the wind rustling through your hair.

I stayed, stirring above to watch your flair
but there's no way you could've seen me heave,
I was never really sure I was there.

I could've rustled more to show I care
then you'd know my breeze when wrapped about you,
I was the wind rustling through your hair,
I was never really sure I was there.



Snip20170703_52.png

What do we take for granted in life? Is it objects, wealth... people? Are we like the wind, simply flowing around the friends and family we love, like mist?
Or is the wind representative of our best efforts, the most we can do as fallible human beings? Can we rustle more to show our loved ones we're there, can we rustle more in standing up for ourselves, for chasing our goals? Our love?
Thank you for spending time here, comments, critiques, hellos are all welcome :)
images sourced from Giphy.com

@prufarchy

Sort:  

this is so so so good!!!! i loved it! upvoted

haha I'm really glad you enjoyed it so much! Thanks for stopping by and letting me know :)

Really really love your poem.... It shown an inherent fault that every one human possesses...

I love your perspective on it:) thanks for reading

Awesome, as usual!
Oh, and yes to me partaking of 'amsterdam' LOL.

Thanks @dreemit !

And yes!!!!!!!!! I love that! I hope you wrote some stuff down ;)

Ohhh, I did....I had some great thoughts that will in fact be used in the return of my short story series The Playground (I'm not sure if you ever read them, they were wayyy at the beginning of my time here. I'm re-releasing with edits and adding some photography, then continuing on)
They're somewhat philosophical, and probably my best writing ever. And I am putting up the first one right now actually :)

That's pretty cool that you're re-releasing with edits and adding photography :) I always wonder about the idea of re-releasing things, I look forward to catching it this updated time around :)))

I gave it a lot of thought, and decided that as long as I was adding value then there was no reason why I shouldn't. I certainly wouldn't have a problem with anyone doing that. Particularly when it comes to something they're proud of and really want shared. I certainly wouldn't do it with anything less :)

Magical you are.

And Magical you stay

Really gorgeous. Captures the proper "enchantment" that is supposed to belong to poetry. Upvoted because I had to.

Did you quasi-follow Dylan's structure?? Xx, Kay

I really appreciate and share your view on the enchantment in poetry.

I wouldn't be surprised if Dylan influenced me in this piece, I'm very fond of his work. Could've also been Plath, or Morrison.

I tend to think we take a bit from every author who causes us resonance.

Coin Marketplace

STEEM 0.20
TRX 0.14
JST 0.030
BTC 66593.69
ETH 3319.32
USDT 1.00
SBD 2.71