That fear of being a poor artist of any kind, writer, actor, photographer, artist.....was drilled into us too. I think it was that era. The baby boomers especially. We had to achieve more than our parents who experienced the great depression.
I'm glad people today are encouraged to hone their talents.
My mom was a boomer. But she had an odd path. She lost her mother at 5 and never healed from that. She was also from a pretty wealthy family - on her mother’s side - who lost almost everything in the big crash and depression, before she was born.
My grandfather was selfmade and my grandmother’s family looked down on him because he wasn’t old money...even though their old money was gone and his new money saved the day. And I think my grandfather was pretty judgmental about the attitude of his wife’s people...the artistic sensibilities and the entitlement.
This all did a real number on my mother.
I try to put myself in her shoes. I try. But she did a real number on me and and I can’t help but wonder why she didn’t want better for her own kids.
Anyway, I got some good things from her, too. And I’m worked no hard to embrace those. I’ve had a tendency to throw the baby out with the bathwater. Damned baby won’t go. So it’s time to learn to love the freakin’ baby.
Ya...that's hard. I know. I have a story similar. These things all leave marks on us.
Just learn to be you, not your mom.
I worked so hard focusing on not being like my mom that I never got to know what I was supposed to be.
Isn’t that the struggle? Very well put. We are going n similar paths, my friend.