Stream of Nonsense - Chapter 2
One day in paradise I wasn't feeling my usual self so I slipped down to the barbers for a pack of cigarettes and spent the rest of the day turning them in to a scale model of the sahara desert. The weather was perfect so I gave up.
'In future' I thought 'I wont be tempted to unlock this little door' so I hid my best clothes behind it. Fortunately I never saw the door again and so there was nothing to fear (If I had not been pregnant with a lamp post perhaps I wouldn't have been so strict with myself).
Every day here is a waiting game. The papers are constantly arriving through the gap in my turkish dresser but Im completely unable to understand a word that is written on them. 'That mole-faced egotist must be heckling the back- benchers by now'
Without thinking any further I murdered a southerner and glued myself to the underside of a volkswagen. The taste is still in my mouth as I write and if I crane my eyes far enough I can just about watch the NFL match being played out just wide of centre court. Please try to ignore what I just said, Im feeling extremely sheepish already.
The real crux of this matter is the timing in which it is all about to unfold; a lesson here, a fable there, a miracle being flaunted in the faces of well-meaning staff and all at the expense of a certifiable birth. I honestly don't know how I will ever come through it all given my status in the parish.
Oh one more thing, that darling little coffee table from the oaksmere just popped round and said you were expecting a baritone to give you up last night. Apparently the bandages were too soggy. Sweet dreams!
Catch up with Chapter 1
If you feel a desire to add nonsense just comment below with the word NONSENSE followed by your nonsense. Try it. Its healthy.
Love from Basil x
Well young Basil, it looks like you've been reading those party political manifestos again and trying to do a succinct summary of their Brexit policies...
We must make a nonsense show sometime soon.
Hehehe, @pennsif, it's great fun talking nonsense sometimes (see my contribution) and it even inspired me to write a post about it and maybe even turn it into a contest of some sorts. I needed the laugh, and who better than our own @basilmarples to make us laugh.
oh YES I would love that. Perhaps when Ive completed a few more chapters I could do a live reading! That would be super fun : ) (these steemies need more nonsense in their lives!)
NONSENSE! I can tell you're talking crap since that darling little coffee table is still standing where it always has. Right here in the aligator forest. It has never left, because I checked the video cameras from the blue house around the corner. Which makes me wonder what else in your story does not add up. Also, by now your pregnancy by that lamp post should be too much to bear, because lamp post pregnancies usually get really difficult by day two. At this stage, you should be popping any time!
And to top it all off: a Volkswagen would never be able to hold the weight of a human pregnancy with a lamp post, so that's bullshit too. I am seriously starting to doubt your nonsense... What are you up to @basilmarples?
clearly the 'mole-faced egotist' has finally turned you against me! You know full well that the good people of the hippopotamus tree will have nothing to do with ANY furniture from the loathsome alligator forest so we must be discussing two separate tables - which would ALSO explain the CCTV, although lets be honest, it wouldn't exactly be difficult to falsify that evidence. Your honour I call for the evidence to be reviewed.
On another note, thankyou so much for enquiring about the pregnancy; yes, it has been a little traumatic but still awaiting the big moment and as for the VW, it is pretty badly buckled now. I shouldn't think we will ever eat at it again.
No mole-faced egotist or green-orange striped scrambler could really turn me against you. I must have been deceived by them, those selfish green fish. I sure hope you'll leave the eating at the VW for someone less pregnant with lamp-posts, as those waterholes can be deceiving. Maybe better stay away from alcohol drenched magnetists altogether. What a wild ride that would be!
Anyway, I am looking forward to see the result of your lamp post union soon. I'm quite sure the willywags on this side of the pond will have a good time deciphering the hops that were once on the other side.