Stream of Nonsense - Chapter 1

One day in Paradise I met a Chimpanzee by the name of Kow. He clearly did not hold much respect for me because he bit both of my hands off. I was ashamed.
In time I aquired new hands made of twigs from a snowman who I met in mid July. I was pleased. The new hands garnered great compliment from the townsfolk and I felt like a newly polished dessert spoon.
The mayor gave me some advice. If ever in doubt about your own inherant sovereignty, simply stare wildly in to the spine of an old thesaurus and recount your earliest childhood memory. I left his office immediately, declaring that I had spilt wine on my siamese cat and was keen to apologise.
The next moment was unlike any I had ever experienced. While dusting off my cavalier hat in the street I was approached by a magnificently adorned lamp post made almost entirely from interwoven asparagus shoots. Being unable to read, I quickly resorted to feebly orated nursery rhymes but it was too late. The lamp post was upon me and I am now pregnant with its first child.

    To be continued.

love from Basil x

**note - if you would like to make additions to this chapter, please leave a comment beginning with the word NONSENSE