SCHOOL FOR PARENTS: How to avoid the most common mistakes in raising children. # 1

Discipline is so subjective that it is difficult to define its scope. Such uncertainty has to do with the fact that parents, inculcating discipline in the child, make mistakes.

SourceParenting is a difficult job for parents. When you have a child, you teach yourself to live in this world and at the same time you learn a lot.

Many parents feel exhausted and helpless when they have a child. Fatherhood brings joy and many problems and changes in lifestyle and work schedules.

At this stage, parents should avoid some mistakes for the child:

- Comfortable lies

SourceWe often ignore the rule that we should do what we teach our children. Forgetting this, do not expect children to follow our advice. Children learn to cheat at an early age. You just have to lie in the details so that the child follows your example. Children grasp the subtlest nuances of lies.

Stories about non-existent monsters, lies about what a child did not attend school and what did not visit their friends, hiding any fact in their spouse are typical situations where the child perceives lies.

Adults call it excuses, but children see it as a lie. Adults can distinguish truth from lies, but for a child it is difficult. The constant use of justifiable lies also teaches the child to lie.

Your task is to show your child a good role model. If you do not, all your educational work will be ineffective. Explain your behavior to the child so that he can understand and sympathize with him. This will give you an honest answer and establish solid relationships. Open communication is a good way to explain your point of view.

- Empty Threats

Source"Stop spilling soup on the table or I will punish you!" Threats and blackmail are common in many families. Doing a household chore (cleaning the room, putting toys, clothes and books in place, learning lessons, eating, etc.) is a daunting task for parents. Therefore, we often threaten the child with consequences for not fulfilling these responsibilities. Computer games, cell phone use, walking, etc.

Unfortunately, parents do not have a serious response and children stop taking them seriously. Children do not understand the importance of parental instructions, and responses in their comprehension become empty words.

In story situations, it is important that your words match the actions. Parents do not like to play the role of "bad cop", but sometimes it is necessary to inculcate discipline in the child. If the child only hears the threats, he realizes that he has a second chance, a third chance, etc. For example, if you say, "Go to dinner or turn off the TV," you probably will not listen until you remind him of a fact. For example, "Do you remember what happened yesterday when you did not go to dinner?" The recorded stories help a child to discipline. When the child understands the rules they are expressing, they will not have to register or threaten them.

- Material incentives

SourcePromotions are a good way to discipline a child. The reward system helps the child to form a good behavior model. However, there is a high probability that this system will become a bribe.

Incorrect motivation leads to the fact that the child puts his selfish motives in the first place. When a child is said, for example: "If you fix your room, you can go for a walk with friends", your motivation becomes a bribe.

It is necessary to help your child understand that the motivation must come from within. If we honestly explain the consequences of not fulfilling your duties, this will also help to understand the seriousness of the situation. For example, you can explain what will happen if you do not prepare for the exams. If the child does not clean the room, he will spend a lot of time looking for the right things, or the harmful insects may start living in the room.

Try to keep this conversation in the form of dialogue, not moralization. When a child has the opportunity to express his point of view, he is more likely to draw conclusions.

"On the road to raising children, parents face many difficulties and many rewards. Both children and parents are constantly learning and learning something new.#

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Posted from my blog with SteemPress : http://deisip67.vornix.blog/2019/03/22/school-for-parents-how-to-avoid-the-most-common-mistakes-in-raising-children-1/

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