Frustration in BJJ - When you think you're hitting a wall

I'm sure that I speak for everyone in the #BJJ community, as I cannot think of one single person who hasn't felt frustrated with their progress before. I'm one of those people, and I have a track record of being very hard on myself. I'm writing this post because I'm sure that many of you can relate to this particular feeling.

There are days and days...

Some sessions are great, you move like Spiderman, and somehow it's just a good class with a great sparring session in the end. You are passing and submitting people, feel that you are advancing, and you leave the academy feeling like a million bucks.

Other days are horrible. Your hips are tight, somehow your body is not doing what your brain tells it to do, your back bothers you more than usual (especially in my case) and you just keep getting tossed around by people who are normally your level, or below.

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Those are the times that you think about quitting BJJ, that you don't have any talent for it, and that you just plain suck. I have days like that, and yesterday was one of them.

It was my first training session after my 10 day trip to Colombia, and I had been off the mats for about 2 weeks. For some reason, 2 weeks feels like 2 years, and it's like all your knowledge goes down the drain. Add to that the fact that my dog had chewed on my mouth-guard (and I realized when I put it on), and that I got kicked in the nose right in the beginning of sparring. I swear, I almost put on a white belt yesterday, and had to choke back some tears of frustration.

What you can do about this:

• Remember the good days. It's very important to remember them, because it reminds you that at some point in the past you were proud of yourself and your achievement. Tell yourself that today is just a bad day and tomorrow will be a new one.
• Remember that EVERYONE has those days and feels like that sometimes, even Royce Gracie. You are not alone, you are not different than the rest, and you don't suck. Only people who give up suck =)
• Thanks to you having a bad day, your sparring partner feels like a million bucks. Now that sounds funny, but when you train with the same people all the time, you start to know each-other's game. You know their attacks, their favorite guard passes, and there is not much room for surprise. When your partner has a bad day, maybe you pass his un-passable guard, and so thanks to his shortcomings you win this time, and vice versa.
• Don't compare yourself to others! We all have different body types, and we all learn differently. Some take longer to remember a technique, others do so right away. Others need to drill endlessly, and others again just have good muscle memory. Comparing yourself doesn't do you any good. If anything compare yourself to where you were 3 months ago.
• Have fun or go home! BJJ should be fun, and if one day you're not feeling 100% and are just going to train because you feel that you have to, you will not enjoy yourself. If you don't enjoy yourself (maybe you're injured, over-trained, stressed or just tired), your mood will show on the mats. Maybe just go watch a movie with your BF or GF instead, and train the following day.
• It's not a race, it's a marathon. I'm telling myself that a lot. Your worst critic is always you, but remember you're only human. So what if today was a total waste of time, nobody gave you a deadline to get your black belt.
• You don't lose, you learn. Even on a crappy day, you still learn something, even if you don't realize it.

Now get off your a$$ and go train! OSS