It's hardly practical to try to work out some common etiquette for whales and minnows. Generally more power you have so less micro management you do.
Like for this situation

I personally am not one to be deterred from upvoting by numerous previous upvotes, but that seems to bother others. Thoughts?

If you are whale it's totally ok not to upvote post which has already got enough reward. In fact for a whale would be the best totally withdraw herself from upvoting, since every upvote is an archetype of micro management.