Stop Asking for Help and Give Your Help Away (How to Communicate)

in #steemit7 years ago (edited)

Hi Everybody !

Lately I've been pretty often receiving a lot of positive messages in steemit.chat (before it went down) about the recent success I had in Steemit. To those I must say thank you so much to all of you !!

The reputation and influence that I acquire I am going to use it for helping as many people (artists mostly) in as many ways I as can.

Hey!.gif

Credit: Anritco

But on the other hand, I've been also had an issue with many other users... Many people were spamming me with messages "PLEASE HELP ME, HELP, HELP I NEED YOUR HELP!"... Yes? How can I help you? ...."UPVOTE MY POST, RESTEEM IT, THANKS!...HEY YOU DIDN'T FOLLOW ME!.

Even tho' I understand how it feels to live in hell and to desperately need a rope to get out from the hole you are living at. This is not the way.

Please don't misunderstand what I am saying. I don't plan to offend you, but actually give you some tools that may help you to get that help you are in need of.

To make it easier let's put some rules

  • Not "I Need", Yes "I Give": There was a person that spammed me few days ago (I won't give names but I will say a lot "person" to neither clarify the genre) begging me for help and tagging me sarcastically of "helper of community" for not answering to his messages 2 minutes after he tagged me six times in an open chat in less than 10 minutes. I attended this artist's questions (because it was an artist and so on got particularly my attention): It was its second post (the first one was an #introduceyourself without the proper proofs of identity) and it was titled "Can I go selfish for a while?" or something like that. He was asking for donations for buying a luxury digitalizer tablet that I don't even have (after 7 years of profession).

Wrong.

As you may guess, this artist didn't do much money. Even tho' at the end I upvoted and supported this person. And of course the spam continued until I gave my reasons and started ignoring all the messages.

  • You Know Nothing Jonh Snow: See, you don't really know what the person you are talking to is going through. In most of cases you don't even know the name of the person (and sometimes bots) you are talking to. Therefore you don't know his/her schedule. I know it's hard, but you have to try at least to be more patient, and not a pain in the butt. Everybody has different times and being too insistent in the wrong way will not only not provide the result you want but also generate a negative impact in your image.

Yes, even if you are not a politician you have a social image.

Which means that every time those that remember you as a spammer will see you posting or commenting, they will instantly ignore and bloq you in their heads (if not in the platform itself). Remember that Steemit has not only upvotes, but downvotes.

Don't play with fire.

  • Improve the Community, Improve WITH the Community: See, we are all humans, are all in the same race of becoming the best version of ourselves, the best we can both in soul and physically. It is a race that each one of us have with him/herself. But we are not alone.

By this I don't mean that there's plenty of people that will help you, but actually there s plenty of people that you should help.

The more people gets your help, the more you are improving as a human being and (your image grows). And Steemit, luckily enough, makes also possible to get some materialistic tools (such as money) in return. So instead bombing others with your problems and needs, offer them a hand.

See, people have enough problems with managing their own lives. In most of cases they don't want more problems into their lives. So in essence what I mean with this is:

Contribute somehow to the community instead just taking advantage of it.

I promise you that sooner or later you will get your reward. And finally, all this doesn't mean that you shouldn't ask for help if you need that. I'm just being terribly sincere about how people in most of cases (not ALL the cases) will react: They wont give a s%!t care about you if you are no one for them. Look:

  • Try to be Objective: Let's put things in perspective. Two possible scenarios:

** Scenario #1. Say, you had an average hard day of work. You come back to home super tired and get into your pc, Steemit, steemit.chat. (You already have your influence -high number of steempower- in the platform).Suddenly you have five new private messages from a guy that you never heard about in your life before. And it goes like this:

"-Please upvote, follow and resteem."
"-Follow x follow"
"-I ll upvote you."
"-link"
"-link"

** Scenario #2. You had an average hard day of work. You come back to home super tired and get into your pc, Steemit, steemit.chat. (You already have your influence -high number of steempower- in the platform). Suddenly you have one new private message from a guy that you saw giving some feedback and help to others in general room chat. And it goes like this:

"-Hey! How are you doing! I'm sorry I'm bothering you but, I've been trying to promote this post of mine in many ways... I've been looking at your posts and they are truly good. I would like to ask you if you have any advice for making mine better? So maybe they will catch more the attention."

Waits for an answer.

Tell me then... Which one would you like to help more?.

Now that you got the point. Let's improve the community together =)

Bye!

Sort:  

Very succinctly put. These kinds of messages have started being attracted to me too recently. I posted about it yesterday.

There are right ways of doing things and many wrong ways. I was particularly taken with your message to give to the community: I was doing ok in my first few weeks but since I started helping at the #minnowsupport project and actively helping, advising and supporting newbies, these past 2 weeks have been a phenomenal growth for me.

Show the community that you are here to help it grow. You will be rewarded - and not just by money .

Best words I've read in this post so far.

It's like this! Getting a good and cooperative role in the community drives you far, far away. Sometimes the result is even better than money itself. Because we, humans, we feel the best pleasure of our lives in being accepted and admired by others.

This is the best gift that this platform can give =)

Thank you. I truly believe this to be true. My first few days here I stumbled around making newbie mistakes but quickly came to realise that community and engagement here are of paramount importance importance.

The more you give of yourself the further you will go. Don't focus on the monetary aspect, don't let that be your drive.

Precisely! If you are humble enough to leave your ego back, learn from your mistakes and keep contributing giving your best... there's no way you don't succeed!

Thanks!
As a new user it is handy to read this post, I have seen a lot of annoying comments of people spamming and begging. Didn't think it was a good look.

Thanks Again!

GB

Thank you for being so open to the idea itself! Welcome to Steemit and I hope you will find a lot of what you are looking for in this amazing community! =))

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All Good

Very Good

Surprisingly Good

Resteemed in Blocks of 3s

Frank III

Thank you so much Frank! I really appreciate it!

The saying my house is your house...

My blog is your blog...

Keep STEEM N ON,
Frank

Frank III you kill me ! I'm following you now because YOU deserve it !

Lol, not the violent type!

It's an honor to have you following me and @anritco YOU sir deserve more recognition with your talents and artistic abilities.

https://steemit.com/art/@anritco/self-portrait-process-and-batteries-included

I am a new user and I have already seen much of what you are talking about in your article.

It is very annoying. If everyone creates quality content we will certainly grow together, because the community in the future will have the strength to compete with the market giants.

Let's stop thinking about today and create a strategy for the future. Surely we'll all be fine.

Excellent article!

Dude, you just won a follower.

I great article to read, as a newcomer! Mahalo!

Thank you @anritco! I read your post prior to writing my into. Much appreciated in my start on Steemit!

My favorite part is that if u help people and never stop...it ends up helping u in ways u never would have imagined...

Precisely! once you open yourself everything is possible. The world is filled with people that thing otherwise, and this is why not really many things are working in the right way.

Good point men, you deserve the follow. I also find out myself that giving will give you more in return. You want to be part and not gain something on the back of others. Never really understood f.e. scammers. Being rich without your own integrity is nothing you will enjoy.

Pretty much! This is how society should work and how the circle should be made! as @rtdcs said in beautiful words: "Let's stop thinking about today and create a strategy for the future."

Nice post. As for me, i'd pay my attention to the one who sent you the message in scenario # 2. At least he sincere in asking you for help in a polite way and being so demanding.

Precisely! And this is how it always works!

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