"But man has almost constant occasion for the help of his brethren, and it is in vain for him to expect it from their benevolence only. He will be more likely to prevail if he can interest their self-love in his favour, and shew them that it is for their own advantage to do for him what he requires of them. Whoever offers to another a bargain of any kind, proposes to do this. Give me that which I want, and you shall have this which you want, is the meaning of every such offer; and it is in this manner that we obtain from one another the far greater part of those good offices which we stand in need of. It is not from the benevolence of the butcher, the brewer, or the baker that we expect our dinner, but from their regard to their own interest. We address ourselves, not to their humanity, but to their self-love, and never talk to them of our own necessities, but of their advantages."
Adam Smith, The Wealth of Nations

It is not necessary to think as a collective to achieve the maximum progress and the greatest mutual benefit, but on the contrary, what benefits us most is that each one of us worries about our own interests and needs. In this way, we will all generate the greatest individual benefit, which translates unequivocally into the greatest group benefit. The collectives do not exist, there are only groups of individuals.

I understand perfectly what you mean by having a sense of belonging and caring for others, being charitable and helping others. But the best way to achieve this, is to think for yourself, when we help others we do it with the hope that they will behave in the same way, helping the community to grow, and indirectly, benefit from the growth of community.