The 4 Quadrants of Connection - how to use this to read Red Flags and Know Unsafe People

I've been sharing from the logical side of relational dynamics, such as noticing gaslighting, reverse victim and concern trolling. Now it's time to share the embodiment side. This share is based on what I've learned from Uzazu, a mind-body integration movement modality I've been practicing for over 10 years. >>>

THE 4 QUADRANTS OF CONNECTION:

  1. Self-Connection.
  2. Boundary between you and your environment.
  3. Contact - your boundary-space (or "bubble") making contact with another person's boundary-space.
  4. Exchange - now we exchange.

(Side-note on boundaries: if we've been without boundaries for so long, sometimes a wall will be constructed first before a healthy boundary can take place - and that's okay. You're allowed to have whatever kind of boundary you want. No need to judge yourself for this nor let others judge yourself).

This model helps avoid some of the dangers of New Age nonsense. For example, I've noticed that most followers are told to connect inward a lot whereas the teachers/perpetrators tend to come from Quadrant 3 and 4 a lot with zero real self-connection.

Connecting too inwards makes you unable to face the world, make real practical changes to the world around or do anything to dismantle systemic oppression.

On the other hand, staying too much in Quadrant 3 and 4 can make you seem charismatic to most people but for me who can read what is actually feels like, it's a different experience.

There are two types of dynamics that happen here with that:

  1. A stream of rapid-fire intrusive parcels of energy shooting at me OR a tsunami of energy coming at me with no real respect for my own individuality (partly because they have no real respect for their own individuality either).

  2. Using me as a wall to hear themselves speak, not really caring one iota about who I am as an individual nor anything I have to say.

So yeah - watch out for these...(Hmm getting too long for FB. May post it on Medium or Steem too some time).

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