What's The Point? Considering Giving Everything Up
I returned from a trip to Europe where I fell off my routine of diet and exercise... and very quickly fell back into depression.
I decided to return to Anarchapulco and went for a walk with the dogs and considered what happened... and came to the conclusion that, in general, nothing material, or of this Earth, interests me much anymore.
One of the reasons I realized this is because I used to get somewhat excited to travel to new places. But on this trip I wasn't excited at all... if anything I was just depressed. And it made me realize that almost everything I used to enjoy, I no longer do.
That led me to pondering about ditching all material items, quitting everything I do and going to live in the forest alone in China... surely to be quickly known as "crazy gwai-lo".
You can see my thought process here:
- (on a sidenote, I have been trying to upload this video to https://dtube.video but it keeps crashing when I try to upload. If anyone knows why please let me know in the comments below as I'd much rather use DTube than YouTube)
I've since spoken to my wife about these thoughts and we may have come up with a plan for me to try out this lifestyle of living alone in the woods, fasting and with nothing for a bit before I decide to do it fully or not. More on that possibly soon. (Or if you don't hear from me for a few weeks that is probably why)
As a perpetual traveler of 3 years now (with my family), we have given up everything (home, possessions, some investments), to travel the globe. I homeschool my kids from the road and they are working a homeschool project that they will eventually turn into some kind of business - when more business is done on the blockchain (which you know isn't too far away now).
While we are free of most "normal" possessions (other than the 1 suitcase and 1 backpack we each carry), we are not free from inconvenience that not having a landing pad with "things" brings. There are trade offs. We used to think not having "things" made us feel more free as we weren't attached to physical possessions. We used to think it allowed us to focus more deeply on our relationships to one another, our passions, our projects - and being free of possessions freed up energy to be focused in other places (like healing/health). We've learned along the way that it's not really the act of being possessionless that gives us the freedom and connection we desire - it's our lack of attachment to external material things/distractions that we used to expect to make us happy. Instead we try to focus on gratitude, sincerity and curiosity.
We recently went through a period of what I call "winter". My son was diagnosed with Epilepsy and he was restricted from swimming, hiking, bike riding - anything physical that might endanger him if he were to go into a seizure. Here is a kid (then age 12), already with a learning disability, who had already given up everything to travel and explore the world, suddenly with another disability, now on anti-seizure meds, wondering what you are wondering right now - what's the point?
While we (as a family) struggled with these new challenges (and mood swings), we focused in on what we could do in the present moment to shift into a more connected, heart centered space. We tapped into his inner passions about life - what brought him joy. When he "didn't know", I had him write letters to himself in the future thanking himself for a, b, c.....future forcasting his greatest joys/inspirations. We found everyday activities to be thankful for and wrote them out - For example: "I am so happy and grateful that I was able to walk to the coffee shop today without symptoms" or "I really appreciated the time I spent playing by myself today". Even if the gratitude felt menial, we included it. We invited questions into our awareness like, "I wonder what it would feel like/be like to....(fill in the blank)".
Everyday moments met with conscious gratitude and curiosity provided the kind of personal connection we all needed to move through that winter. Those exercises also helped us to vision their current homeschool project. To date, the kids have now produced 3 children's books and an upcoming music CD they composed music for to accompany their future comic book series. Had we not taken the time to go deep within, who knows if these inspired ideas would have surfaced.
So, in my experience, it wasn't the lack of physical/monetary possessions that helped us answer the question, "What's the point" or "What's my purpose?". It's been more the continued cultivation of gratitude, sincerity, humility and curiosity. It's the attitude and sincerity with which the questions of the mind are invited to be answered by the deeper levels of our awareness (heart/soul).
I don't believe the answers are in the woods, my friend. Wherever you go - there you are. It's all within.
Great point. I live in Alaska where people come from all over to live secluded in the woods. Many have given up everything. Some find the answers and peace they were looking for, some don't but it was never the woods that gave it to them. It was within.
BRILLIANT!!!! AND TRUE!!!
Material possessions only POWER what we are DEEP within. So if anything, material possessions help FACILITATE what we are at core.
For example, I envision a life where I don't have to trade my time for money and explore life on different planes...while my friends who are born into money who can do these things are AFTER more money...so you are absolutely RIGHT, it is not the possessions, it is our core that needs introspection!
Thank you for sharing!
You have a touching story, but please let me ask you how you manage all the expenses to have such a "free life", considering also all the problems? From time to time I am also dreaming for such a freedom, but it seems this lifestyle is suited only for wealthy people. But if you depend on a bank account you are not really free, isn't?
I was 22 when I went traveling the world , and have been for the last 25 years or so - I walked away with $700 in my pocket, and never looked back ( admittedly I have stayed single, and with no kids- somakes the logistics much easier)
I have had an amazing ride !
You are a star.
@cm1 Just wondering if you have looked into using CBD for your son. It provides many benefits in relation to neurological issues. You might like to look up https://pluscbdoil.com/
@birdsong, yes, my son takes cbd's (where it's been "legalized"). Some countries we visit do not allow the use of cbd's - even if they are over the counter cbd's from the states (like Native Hemp or CW Botanicals). So this has presented new challenges in how/where we travel and/or for how long we travel. While cbd's are incredibly helpful, they do not eliminate all the seizures. We've been dialing in his nutrition while he also has been on the ketogenic diet. To date, with combined nutrition, keto and cbd's, he has seen a 50% reduction in seizure activity and about an 80% reduction in seizure related symptioms (aura's, etc). I'll check out the link you sent . Thanks so much! :)
Yeah, you may not want to visit Australia too soon. The government here is so pro big pharma and anything that actually works becomes illegal. Doesn't help when the prime ministers wife is on the board of a pro vaccine creating company. As to your son, make sure you are using the correct concentration. I believe the gold blend from pluscbd is very good and then it's simply a matter of increasing the dosage until you get the desired result. Might be worth contacting them directly to get some guidance. Also, I forgot to mention, if you use the code RSB15 you'll get a 15% discount. It's a discount given to Robert Scott Bell listeners (I'm one of them) who are big promoters of pluscbd. Robert's podcasts are well worth subscribing to.
All the best.
Awesome inspiration. Going to try thatt one day
This is fantastic. Thank you.
Well written! It is a difficult illness to deal with and I wish anyone who is, all the best.
Deep and yes!!!! you are right, the attachment itself if the thing.
THANK YOU for sharing that. We chucked the city life to become farmers, and that is not really going that well. The thought of "Liquidate and go gypsy" haunts me at times. I appreciate your input VERY much...
IDEA: it's a myth your son shud restrict physical acticity--that doin so is going to MASSIVELY accelerate the decline of his human animal body. and idea that your brain computer is brainwashed to be going to doctors. cheers :)
Jeff,
Didn't sound that convincing actually what you said, because we're still here in the world and there wasn't any foundation given in your comment to cause anyone to believe it. Just say why it's true, or tell everyone why we're all guilty of all these crimes, or innocent. Explain it to help people understand. Not being sarcastic, I'm just asking you to explain why it's true.
Try your son's medication. Just take it for awhile and see how you feel. It's important. It might let you understand something really important about your Son.
D.tube doesnt work for me either it is still under-going alot of maintenance. And I just had a white sausage with sauerkraut. And Jeff, you do not have to restrict your lifestyle to what you can and cannot drink or eat to find fulfillment. Look at the laws of God and Christ and you will find complete fulfillment. Meditate on the Gospel and you will know...
Matthew 15:11
"What goes into someone's mouth does not defile them, but what comes out of their mouth, that is what defiles them "
Good post thanks for sharing !!
In other words eat meat!
No, eat vegetables. Being vegan isn't the problem.
Ouch 😂
Phrasing?
The original teaching of the Christ includes NOT eating or killing meat.
MMMMMMM NO. Jesus was a jew so he ate lamb or goat for passover.
MMM YUP. Most of the current bible is bullshit. There are 2 'gods' in the bible. One of them is the devil. Do you know which part?
Read: The targum, The gospel of 12. You will find most of the bullshit in christianity is in fact, bullshit. The truth is also contained within, but takes great discernment to tell both. In those books, you will see that we in fact not to kill animals or eat them. One of the CORE rules. Lambs and Goats refer to types of people. Not food. The Jesus (Hey-Zeus) is the counterfeit Jesus, or plastic jesus. I'd suggest you read a bit more you are misinformed.
Seriously all we need in life is some shelter, food, water and things we love to do mostly outside. Just doing the things you love sharing it with others is all we need but instead we work our butts off for things we think we need in order to fill that cap which is honestly free to us.
Thanks for sharing
Jeff you are obviously a talented guy and I do feel like I get where you are coming from. No one can know your path but you, but it seems you need a new challenge and you are not sure what horizons are left to conquer. The internal path is useful and you are already on it. What lifestyle can compliment it?
I wonder if it would be helpful for you to have an art form to externalize the internal path you are on. Allow yourself to create something beautiful to share with the world as you become more conscious.
I wonder if you have ever considered being land holder/owner. It seems like you have the resources and intellect to be successful in such an endeavor. Being a good steward to this earth is in great need. It can be fulfilling as nature is the best teacher. I do believe land can be both productive and harmonious with nature. This is one of the arts I am currently devoted to. It is challenging but that is what keeps it engaging.
Just a thought I felt like offering up. Like I said only you know your path. But it is difficult to find some woods to live in these days. Most land is private and the state doesn't want you squatting on their land either. Might as well own a part of the forest where you can build your hermit shanty. Your monk's cave.
With the right time and intention that space could be used to heal others as well as yourself. Nothing is more healing than helping others heal.
I would say try cycling, it's really great for your mental health. The combination of endorphins and riding through beautiful scenery away from the city really works wonders. You will sleep great and be fitter than you've ever been. The app Strava is great for it as well as you can monitor your progress and strive for improvements.
I know the feeling of not really being interested in traveling, as I traveled a lot as a child, so I didn't care much about traveling as an adult.
Sorry if you don't like my person, as you wrote "fuck off" resently in a post, I let it go... you know what it was about..
I think you have done a lot of great work, vocalizing many topics I personally thought about in similar ways...
About you being depressed... let me try to come with something to this... you might not like what I write, but thats how it is sometimes: You say you adobted two children right?? Thats how I understood it? So if I am not wrong, then maybe you are missing being a biological father.
Personally I would never date a single mother, but thats another topic. What I am saying is, maybe what you are missing is being a real father, meaning have your own biological child/children... if I understood it correctly that you adoubted... you might not like me saying this, also since it can be tabu since you are married after all...
Anyway Keep up the good work, I resently began to beleive that we can get rid of the old systems in our lifetime.
I wanted to add that I think you should keep doing what you are doing, not go living in the woods... I think you are the most recognized face in crypto, so when you feel tired or depressed just take a break and come back when you are ready... not giving up!!
Just look at the bitcoin price, we are winning every day!!
King Solomon in the bible talked about it as well.
The wises man in the world. Everything is a chase of nothing
Regardless of your religious beliefs, I recommend that anyone in such a state of mind read the book of Ecclesiastes. It offers valuable perspective as well as validation to those who are ready to brush aside the distractions and struggle with the concept of meaningful life.
I can't stop watching/reading/listening.