Is REALITY merely the synthetic-cryptographic-overlay of a cosmic ERP system for an alien male enhancement drug company?

I've read a little, and heard a lot, about a group of scientists and philosophers that believe it is plausible that the universe, or reality, is a simulation. Sounds like hullabaloo to me, or rather a "distinction without a difference". Let's say the universe is really a complex set of algorithms running in super advanced, deeply parallel, quantum processors in some cave some place ...

All of this might be true ... that the world is like the movie "The Matrix", but less cheesy and sexy. I see this, I get this, but I don't care. It might be a highly immersive game for "functional pseudo-bots" that are based on some crappy deep-brain mapping thingy and other esoteric bullshit ... it might be, I might be. But from my perspective it makes no difference. If this is a game, or a movie, I am still a side character - some dude that gets blown up, or murdered by a mobster, or gets set on fire, or whatever ... I don't get the sexy emo chick.

I will go further ...

If they prove it's a simulation, I have a theory as to what kind it is ...

Sure, it can only be a theory, because PER my theory we are merely an emergent property substrate living on top of complex cryptography and other communications protocols ...

Some of my co-workers ask me personal questions, and it seems like "well, maybe that's normal ..."

But what if "reality" or the "universe" is really the electromagnetic noise and quantum flux of a realm that simply exists as an after-effect of the most advanced, most efficient, ERP system ever ... ZAP 9988.45 (the .44 model had some serious issues)? That would be crazy ...

When my co-workers were asking me about what I eat? - they weren't asking me that ...

This was the real inquiry into ZAP:

"Captain JANKO of the STARSHIP MONDO wanted to know when he could pick up the tylerium-66 shipments for delivery for Queen NOBO's annual fete ..."

And what if I told you that there were many universes like this?

There were many nodes in the ZAP system?

Each providing ERP support (enterprise resource planning, that means logistics or "moving crap around" support) for different enterprises?

Each enterprise support scenario making each universe different, some being really creepy ones ...

What if our pursuit of "quantum computers", from within the simulation, triggers an entanglement scenario with the nearby ERP systems? ... that would be awesome ...

Power outages end the universe, if you don't have adequate back-up power or bantorium batteries (and nobody can afford those in 3466) ... well ... the power goes out and your "universe" ceases to exist, but ZAP INC. will have another quantum nodal network online and running in minutes ... and that's great news for ZAP INC., their stock value flat-lined last quarter due to a gamboorgilax miner's strike ... you need this crap for super-advanced-self-organizing-quantum-nodes-that-don't-get-too-smart ... too smart is bad ... better to lose a few universes.

Yes ...

You might just be a business object, in some truly advanced cosmic ERP system, a large software platform for supporting the core functions of any business: accounting, sales, logistics, supply chain, operations, r&d, etc.

Every time someone asks you a question, it just might be another piece of software in the ZAP ecosystem launching a trans-78-format inquiry, and not an actual human talking to you. You are software man ... code ... crap ... sad ... :(

But with all that, and it is quite dismal in existential terms, you now must learn the terrible truth ...

The universe you exist in, and will die in ... never to be deserialized back into ...

That universe exists as the substrate of a ZAP install that supports a large conglomerate that manufactures male enhancement products and pesticides to combat cosmic-space-blight ...

Tylerium-66 is one of their signature products, most species with male/female junk-related sexual types LOVE this product ... they really do ... if a universe has to be destroyed to reset a major order of "Tyler" (street name for Tylerium-66)? - then yes, that universe is destroyed to reset the system. Nobody cares ... people need to be "getting busy with it".

How does that make you feel man?

(thank goodness I'm kidding)