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RE: How to break a dry spell (for men)

in #sex5 years ago

Even if you try to change the term alpha a little, I think the choice of this word is inappropriate in relation to the relationship between man and woman. The term alpha is taken from the animal world and describes the leading animal of a herd.
We humans no longer live in tribes ourselves, but in large civilizations, where this form of animal leadership often has very negative connotations. I find it really unfortunate how often you use the word, but especially in combination with the numerous curses (fucking, fuck).

It alienates me that you seem so accustomed to calling the bodily union by terms commonly associated with insults?

Maybe you think that the use of the word "fuck" is descriptive and significant for the physical relationship, but I would think it cannot be ignored that in general use of the word "fuck" is meant a swearword and a devaluation.

If something falls down and breaks on the floor, you say "fuck", you say it on almost every possible occasion, as a single exclamation "fuck" can stand for surprise, pain, fear, disappointment or anger.

I find it highly peculiar to use it to make two people intimate with each other. It's a contradiction.

You will hardly be able to trace this development of language use back, except that you completely refrain from using it at all. Are you American?
We have a lot less censorship in movies and series here and I understand the frequent use as a rebellion against censorship, but it's still exaggerated for me and not fitting in the context you wrote about.

It makes your article, which I find quite interesting in some aspects, smaller and reduces it in a strange way, as if you don't necessarily believe yourself.

I may be wrong, but I think no woman (and actually no man) likes it when you say you fucked him or her.

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Hey Erika... lovely to have you reading and commenting, you're one of the first people to actually properly engage with my writings :) When I use the word 'alpha' I am referring to the term as defined by the ultimate authority the Urban dictionary:

Alpha Male
"Generally the guy who gets all the babes. The Alpha Male is very confident and steadfast. Here are some of the traits of the alpha male.

Charismatic
Intelligent
Masculine
Manly
Calculating
Not offended by small meaningless things.
Doesn't give others shit but he doesn't take shit either.
Does not give two fucks about what others think of them."

This is my meaning.

I swear because I swear with my mouth in real life and it is my way of expression. I don't believe a 'harmful' word used with good intentions is harmful. Just because the word 'fuck' is used as an insult does not necessarily disqualify it for positive usage. Bodily union is one way of viewing/framing sex, fucking is another... I find both of equal value, legitimacy, and enjoyment.
Peace and love xo

Happily I receive your friendly response.

You are certainly right, if you speak so freely with your girlfriend and mean it teasingly, no mischief will happen. But I am afraid the people who are not so close to you are not so perfect. I would think that one should always reckon with the imperfection and vulnerability of others, just as in road traffic. Your language is seen as a violation of dignity for the many who find that others do evil to them.

You simply minimize the chance to contribute to this illusion by practicing a little adaptation to customs in public space.

**ck you very much ;-)

Oh, and

Doesn't give others shit but he doesn't take shit either.
Does not give two fucks about what others think of them."

Nah ... still sounds as if you give a stinky finger instead ...

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