"Naomi Brockwell" another Side Story from The Apology Screenplay

dougscrib (53)in #screenplay • 8 years ago

Hi All,

Here is another side story from a screenplay I'm writing called the Apology.

This one deals with a character called Naomi Brockwell... yes based on the "Bitcoin Girl" Naomi Brockwell we all know and love! However, though the name is the same (due to some comedy you will see below), and her cute Australian accent is required (for more comedy), in this story she is NOT Bitcoin Girl playing herself, but another character who just happens share the same name and traits.

I obviously did this on purpose because I want Naomi to play this part.

She read the script, and she is on board if we ever move forward with it! Woo hoo!

So, please enjoy the next Side Story from The Apology!

The Apology Side Stories Naomi Brockwell

Naomi lives in New York City and is the owner of a line of professional greeting cards that appears across the country in many convenience stores and gas stations. She is trying to make it to the big time and challenge Hallmark and other lines and finally make it in to big retail outlets like Target, large grocery chains, and WalMart.

However her secret passion is acting, which she can’t do very well mainly because of her thick Australian accent she has the hardest time changing when she goes to auditions. In fact, one time she auditions for the part of an Australian woman, and doesn’t get the part because the directors think her Australian accent is really bad...and that she continues to talk with one as some sort of stuck up actor thing.

The bureaucracy, regulations, lawyers, insurance, unions and other red tape keeps her nearly broke despite her success with her greeting card line.

We are introduced to her largely through her vlogs chronicling her challenges with her company and her attempts to break into acting.

One day , she is anonymously approached by a mysterious entity who wants to pay her to write a series of anonymous letters to be sold online for bitcoin. She would get a cut of every letter sold and be paid in bitcoin. The anonymous entity shows her a Bitcoin address proving their success selling an apology letter. She has heard of the apology letter and it’s becoming a bit of a scandal.

Will she do it ?

Possible Comedy exchanges [Series of live action and Naomi’s Vlog]
Audition #1

INT. NAOMI’S DESK Speaking into a webcam

     Naomi

Well viewers, today I found out my card line was picked up by Shiners. They’re a car wash chain with 19 locations in Indiana and Ohio. Sure it’s not super glamorous and it’s not Target or Walmart yet, but my line can now be found in over 416 different physical locations; buy one today! But the real news is that I have another audition today!

EXT. WALKING THE STREETS OF NEW YORK LOOKING FOR AN ADDRESS -- EVENING

      NAOMI (VO CONTINUING)

It’s for the part of Veronica in a play called Love And The Jack Of Spades. She is a driven woman who is an heir to a casino mogul

INT. -- STAGE IN A THEATER -- CONTINUOUS

The director and his assistant are the only two in the audience.

               NAOMI (VO CONTINUES)

I think I have a real shot at this, as I can really identify with the character. My father hosted monthly poker games in our basement for years.

       PLAY DIRECTOR

All right Miss . . . Bricknell

               NAOMI

Brockwell

                 PLAY DIRECTOR

What? Okay, this is for the part of Veronica; the scene is at a legal deposition, she is claiming she is the rightful heir of the family fortune, and go.

         NAOMI

Now? Right then, from the top of page 14? okay. . .

         DIRECTOR OF PLAY

Hold on. What are you doing? with the accent thing?

           NAOMI

Oh, I’m from Australia and

                   DIRECTOR OF PLAY

Okay, but be sure to lose it. Veronica is from the deep South.

                      NAOMI

Yes, I know

Director signals to start

                NAOMI (as Veronica with very bad  Southern accent)

“My father built The Spade Casino into what it is today. I was there with him on opening day, along with my mother so I am certainly entitled a portion of his estate"

                       DIRECTOR’S ASSISTANT (reading another  part)

“Your father remarried my mother, and you weren’t in his will; so, no, you don’t have any claim on the estate.

                    NAOMI (as Veronica)

“I can’t help it if your mother was a whore and had a one night stand with my father. Look at these photos in this album. I was more of daughter than you ever were plus . . .”

                      DIRECTOR

Okay thank you. Next.

                  NAOMI

Oh, okay then. Will there be a call back?

Naomi is nearly pushed off stage by the next actress. She walks outside as

(VO CONTINUES)

                   Naomi (VO)

I’m really looking forward to my next audition

                      NAOMI (via a new Vlog entry)

Hello viewers! Check this out… this is a script for a play called Kangaroo Court. It’s a way way off Broadway theater, but still a great opportunity. And this one will be a piece of cake. Why? awww, thanks for asking! Get a load of this, the part I’m auditioning for is a woman with an AUSTRALIAN accent! Hah! This is a done deal! I’ve got a REAL Australian accent. This has really made my day… and I’ve had such a bad week.... Loyal viewers know that I’m in a legal battle with another greeting card company that rhymes with ‘ballpark’. Ugh, they are such bullies, they actually got some laws passed to keep out competition from bigger stores… it makes me so mad! But. . . . calm, clear, ready…. let me read one of my excellent cards to relieve stress

She picks up a card and reads it

         NAOMI (CONT.)

“When life throws you curve balls, time to have some high balls” You like that one? And look there is picture of a martini. Which reminds me. . .
[she pulls in a huge martini and takes a big drink]
Ahhh...there ya go. Okay, this was better than the card, but you should still buy my cards. Oh!!! I can’t wait for this audition!!

EXT. WALKING THE STREETS OF NEW YORK

                NAOMI (VO CONTINUING)

I mean it takes place IN Australia, I could probably do all the roles, even the blokes! See? What lame American actor can do this accent so perfectly?
[Doing a an imitation of an American doing an imitation of an Australian]
“Hi, I’m Mel Gibson blokes. Put another shrimp on the barbie and fill up on some petrol so you can take me to the Thunderdome; but don’t forget your knife! That’s not a knife, now that’s a knife”
Puhlease!

INT. NEARLY EMPTY THEATER

Naomi walks on stage. A different director and assistant are the only ones in the audience.

                     NAOMI (VO Cont.)

This part is so mine!

          DIRECTRO

Okay, next up Naomi Butswell

           NAOMI

Brockwell

                DIRECTOR

Yes, doing the part of Gabrielle top of page 23

                  NAOMI

Hello. Yes, before I start, I’d just like say that I’m from Australia and grew up there.

             DIRECTOR

Yes, the character Gabrielle is from Australia, so please continue with your best accent.

          NAOMI

Right, yes, and I really am from Australia and this my accent.

                DIRECTOR

Okay, fine, whatever techniques you need to get into character. This is the scene where Gabrielle and Alligator Mac are on the run in the Outback and are sitting at a campfire, roasting kangaroo he killed with a knife.

                   NAOMI

No, I mean ... well -- As a native of Australia, I can tell you alligators aren’t native to the land down under.

          DIRECTOR

What? Do you want to read for this part or not?

                NAOMI

Yep, Okay top of page 23. Ahem.

                   NAOMI (as GABRIELLE)

Right Mac, do you expect me to eat this beast you just killed with a knife?

                 DIRECTOR’S ASSISTANT (as MAC)

I don’t expect anything from you except to do what you're told until we can find your sister.

                    NAOMI (as GABRIELLE)

Well what am I supposed to eat mate? this is nothing like the cultured food of my upbringing. Oh, where can my sister be? How I remember our youth so fondly; playing croquet, eating vegemite sandwiches, putting another shrimp on the barbie; we would laugh and play dominoes until bedtime.

                     DIRECTOR

Hold it. So I like your reading. But can you try to make your accent, more….. authentic?

              NAOMI

Well, this is authentic. This is a real Aussy accent.

                        DIRECTOR

Hmmmn…. No it’s not. I know what an Australian accent sounds like, and you are sounding more like, I don’t know, like New Sealand.

                        NAOMI

You mean mean New Zealand? With a Z… you know where they shot Lord of the Rings.

                      DIRECTOR

You know there are 8 other actresses waiting to read for this part, and that’s just today, you wanna try again and give me an accent that Americans will believe is Australian?

                    NAOMI

Yep, okay, top of page 24.

                     NAOMI (as GABRIELLE)

How I remember our youth so fondly; playing croquet, eating vegemite sandwiches, putting another shrimp on the barbie; we would laugh and play dominoes until bedtime.

                          DIRECTOR’S ASSISTENT (as MAC)

How about you shut your trap so we don’t attract any alligators?

                  NAOMI

(Purposely throwing the audition and not following the script)
But Mac, everybody knows that there are no alligators in Australia, only crocodiles. Alligators are native to the southern US and China. You’re such a stupid bloke. Now that’s a knife!

                       DIRECTOR

NEXT!

                       NAOMI (leaving the stage, VO)

Well viewers, maybe acting isn’t for me, but oh how I yearn for a release of my inner voice! I suppose I should concentrate on my greeting card line or find some other creative outlet.

INT. -- NAOMI'S OFFICE -- LATER

                       NAOMI

(in vlog form speaking to camera)
Speaking of which, I got an email from some anonymous entity saying they want me to write long form letters or something like that and be paid in bitcoin. Sounds shady, and interesting at the same time! Until next time!

End side story

#script #comedy #naomi #brockwell