Meet The Freak 66

Meet The Freak 66

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Wallace


It wasn't the most comfortable driving experience, what with the improvised seating, but the van got us back to the hotel with a minimum of drama.

Cassius had done some more finishing work to the gatehouse and ramp, which included adding material to lengthen the slope. The drawbridge was already down when we arrived, the sun high in the sky, and Regina was there to meet us.

Amora's window was open, and Regina rose to put her paws on the sill, the tips of her claws protruding ever so slightly as she regarded the little goddess. Amora leaned well back and gave me the briefest of pleading looks before fixing her gaze on Regina's paws.

"This is the creature that invaded the dreams of myself and Lady Valentine. I'd thought we left her shackled in her little hovel," Regina rumbled.

"I need her to deal with the aftermath from taking out Simon. Besides, she's promised to cooperate."

"And if she does not?"

"I dunno, I'll throw her off the roof or something. I'm sorry, Regina, I know it's a lot to spring on you guys, and you deserve an explanation-"

Regina stepped back from the van, and her paws thumped back to the ground, "Lady Valentine is recovering in the penthouse. I can watch the girl. Go tend to your lady."

I put my hands together, "You’re the best. As for you,” I added, catching Amora’s eye, “Out!"

"What?" Amora protested.

"Regina's going to babysit you while I make sure Val, who nearly died dealing with your bullshit, is okay. Get out."

Regina took a few steps back, as much to reassure Amora as to give her room to open the door, and fixed her huge leonine eyes on the demigod.

Amora's hand trembled as it found the door handle, but she mustered the courage to pull the handle and step out of the van.

I took the van out of park and lifted my foot off the brake. If Amora proved a problem, Regina could always eat her.

I pulled the van in under the portico and turned off the ignition. I considered taking the keys, but if Amora really wanted to run off, then I wasn’t about to waste the effort to cage her. Besides, it wasn’t worth the hassle if one of the others needed to use the van in a hurry, so I left the keys on the dash.

The others had the decency to bring their vehicle around back, but I wasn't about to take the time. I needed to see Val like I needed to breathe, and I was so out of sorts that I'd begun to push through the door to the stairs before I remembered we had a working elevator.

The waiting was absolute torment. Waiting for the elevator to reach my floor and more waiting while it carried me to the penthouse. I knew in a rational sense that it was faster than climbing twelve flights of stairs, god knows I'd seen enough stairs, but something about the lack of movement made it feel longer.

I forced myself to keep a regular pace as I left the elevator and walked over to the penthouse door. I wanted to run right to it and burst through, but if Val was asleep, the last thing she needed was my heavy footfalls rousing her.

I turned the knob slowly, and the door swung quietly open on oiled hinges.

I expected to find Amity tending to Val while she rested in bed, but instead, Valentine dozed on the couch among an enormous pile of blankets. On the television, the credits to whatever she’d been watching scrolled past.

I crept across the carpet and knelt beside the couch. She was so very pale. With hardly a hint of colour, her skin stood out white against her purple hair.

She stirred slightly, and her lashes fluttered.

"I like this Hulk fellow," she told me, her voice so faint I had to strain to hear it.

I glanced up at the television and then back to her.

"Amity says I need to rest," Val murmured, her voice a little stronger this time, "So I'm resting."

"And watching movies, apparently."

"Resting is boring."

I brushed her hair from her face with a delicate sweep of my fingers and leaned down to kiss her. She lifted a hand to pull me into the kiss, but she had hardly the strength to lift her arm, and I felt only the slightest of pressure from her grip.

"Mmm," Val sighed, "Amity did say I would require a great deal of affection to recover properly."

"Did she now?"

Val frowned petulantly, "No, she said I should avoid any gymnastics- her words -until I was fully recovered. Which is why I sent her to go bother someone else."

I raised my eyebrows, "That explains her absence. I was kind of expecting her to be here helping out."

"I can take care of myself," she protested, though the last few words came out in a breathy huff, and her breathing quickened.

"You sure? You okay?"

Val's jaw tightened, and she took a few deep breaths. Finally, she shook her head, some colour returning to her cheeks in a flush.

"Could you please help me to the bath? Just lifting my arms to wash my hair is a trial."

"It's no problem, Val," I assured her.

I reached within the blankets and lifted her out, and she buried her face against my shoulder to hide her blush.

"What- Hey, what the hell is this?"

Val had been naked under the blankets, but as I carried her through into the bathroom I noticed that standing out starkly against the pale skin of her right hip was a-

She pulled her face back just enough to look up at me with one violet eye, "It's a handprint."

"That's a big damn handprint- It's a damn big six-fingered handprint," I realized, "You're supposed to be resting. What the hell are you doing getting tattoos?"

"It's not a tattoo," she protested, "I had nothing to do but sit around, so I brought Phoebe up to do a test design. It's just some ink. It will wash off in the bath."

I knelt by the tub and held Val in my lap while I turned on the faucet and waited for it to fill.

"A handprint, really?"

"I considered having her scrawl Property of Wallace or some other filth across the small of my back, but that seemed a little crass."

"And a handprint is so much better."

"It gets the idea across," then she managed a weak grin, "The idea being- Mmmphh."

I placed my hand gently over her mouth and smiled despite myself.

"And... everything's suddenly back to normal," I chuckled.

She arched an eyebrow, and her eyes flicked down to her waist for a moment. I leaned back to consider the drawing better and frowned in thought. Was there something I'd missed?

And then it clicked. I should have caught it sooner. After all, I could see all six fingers from the front, which left the thumb hooked around the back.

I rolled my eyes, "Get in the damn tub."


"So the Hulk is your favourite?" I prompted once we'd returned to the couch.

I had my head propped up on the arm of the couch while her lithe body pooled against my chest, covered in a sheet of silken purple hair and every blanket she could lay her hands on.

"It's seductive. There is so much that aggravates me, and often I can do only very little about it. Were I able to turn into an enormous green avatar of fury and smash all that offends me, the world would be a much better place. To hell with nuance, sometimes all I want to do is smash."

I snorted, "No kidding."

"Have I said something amusing?”

“Smash has other connotations in english slang.”

“Ah, accidental double entendre. Those are my favourite kind."

I nuzzled the top of her head, and she giggled softly, "I was worried about you, you know. I didn't think you'd be in any state to joke around."

"Oh, I have no illusions. I'm an abject disaster. I can hardly lift my head," she inhaled deeply and smiled, "Not that I'd want to, but the fact remains."

"Does Amity know what's wrong?"

"She explained it to me as best she could. Partly it is simple exhaustion, though on a tremendous level. But that's not the whole of it. She said that when a human engages in physical activity- she reasoned the same should be true for fey -it damages the muscle fibres. This causes them to ache afterwards and is in keeping with the general feeling across my entire body. The upside, at least for humans, is that the repaired fibres are stronger than they were before."

"Yeah, if you're not a freak like me, that's what it takes to put on muscle mass. Does Amity-"

"If it does leave me stronger than before, it hardly matters," she replied, "Strength, while useful, is not my primary deficiency, it is stamina. Solving that is your task, and I'll hear no protests this time. No more debate, no more tests. I need this. We've seen the proof of it. Had our foes been less cocksure, we'd not have made it out of the city."

"A handprint," I said flatly.

"A handprint," she smiled.

"What if, god forbid, things don't last forever? Most things don’t. Say we go our separate ways. Are you going to go around with a six-fingered handprint on your body for the rest of your life?"

"Your concern is touching, but it is something I've considered. I'll simply add another tattoo to my collection, one that is appropriate to my new partner. Perhaps if I become involved with Regina, I'll get a pair of paw prints tattooed on my shoulder blades."

"Alright, alright, you win. I guess I should just be happy I don't need to enchant a tattoo for each of the girls from The Blushing Maiden."

"Mmmm, I thought about it," she admitted, "Nothing serious, just to tease you," she assured me, "But it's not the same. They're my friends, and I care for them very much, but the relationship was always one of convenience."

"That's fair. When I think of you, one of the words that most comes to mind is inconvenience."

"Aww, poor baby," she teased, "Is making love to me such a chore?"

"Yes."

She laughed and slapped my chest weakly, "Be careful. Once you've worked your enchantments, maybe I'll take charge. I won't have to get down on my knees and beg. I'll just take what I want and leave you begging for respite."

"Nah," I yawned, "Maybe I'll put in an off-switch. You get too uppity, and I turn your powers off- Oh! A mute button, you definitely need one of those."

"Careful, keep on threatening me with a good time and I'm liable to get excited. Amity said I'm supposed to be resting."

"I take it you guys made it out okay?"

"I don't see why you're asking me. I was asleep for most of it," she teased, "But yes. Amity explained it to me after. She and Regina found a police station- I understand they are what passes for the city guard in a human city -and found a selection of keys. She noted they were all the same and reasoned that the police vehicles were all keyed alike."

"That's true. Come to think of it, I think there was a police van in the parking garage where we ended up crashing the wagon we stole off the fey."

"Quite. I'm given to understand Amity has some work she wishes to do. In the meantime, I believe it resides in the parking garage. What of yourself? How fares the city?"

"City's fucked. The survivors are pulling out and heading north. Agamemnon looks like he's gonna try trucking out anything worth keeping. I don't think he's going to be top dog any more, though. Seems like they might be splitting up a bit, though they'll remain neighbours. Oh, and maybe I should mention, I brought Amora here."

"The supposed goddess of love, Amora? Amora, the one who threatened to kill all of her followers, should we raise a hand against her? The Amora who sided with the fey that sought my capture? That Amora?"

"That's the one," I agreed, "Turns out she's kind of terrible at being a goddess. She was bluffing about the killing her followers thing, by the way. Aside from it not being within her power, she doesn't even have any followers to kill in the first place."

Val frowned, "That makes absolutely no sense. I don't deny that her powers are lacklustre, but her followers should be among the most numerous. She shouldn’t have anywhere near the least, let alone zero."

"Oh, she had plenty before they got scooped off their homeworld and dropped on this one. And plenty of the followers of other gods were also quite fond of her, for reasons that are probably obvious. But most of her people weren't sent along for the ride."

"Sent? You act as if it was a deliberate choice to move their city here."

"Well, if what I heard from Roxxy is true, it might have been."

"Do elaborate."

"She explained how each of the gods received their powers. She came across someone who had omnipotence, but only in their little personal pocket dimension. He'd bring them into his world, grant them whatever powers, and send them back."

"Whatever for?"

"That's just it. Roxxy indicated that he seemed to be trying to get the attention of something, and considering what happened to the city, it seemed to work. He made a big mess of his world, and it seems an awful lot like the green mists swept in and cleaned it up. My guess is this world is an interdimensional garbage dump. Anything too bothersome ends up here, and the tides sweep most of it away to make room for the next day's garbage."

"That's hardly encouraging, to learn we might be rats scavenging in a midden heap. Why this world, in particular, I wonder?"

I shrugged, "Might not be just this one. If the goal is to dispose of, or at least quarantine, inconvenient people, places, and things, it makes sense to contaminate as few dimensions as possible. With The Father and all its moons, this world has probably got more space for all that junk than most."

"What do we do about it? I can’t say I’d choose to live in a garbage dump, given the option."

"I don't think there's anything to do. I didn't choose to be born on my homeworld either. That was just as out of my control as this was. But I've got to say, even when you consider all the people trying to screw with us, I like this place a hell of a lot better than home."

Val nodded slowly, "If not for my own arrival here, I'd still be a broken little doll, put on display and made to play the piano to amuse my family's guests."

"I'm not saying there aren't problems. Foremost being Simon. But that's why I've got Amora. This world is small enough that a couple of determined people have actually got a shot at fixing things."

"Ah yes, I was wondering what your designs on her are."

"I think Pelignos is primed to fall. Societies built on slaves just aren't stable long term. Pelignos has an edge because there's a degree of chemical control involved, but that's tenuous."

"You think the sprites will rise up to overthrow the fey if the pheromones are taken away."

"I think getting the sprites to overthrow the fey is the easy part. The hard part is limiting the bloodshed to those who deserve it."

"Any fey still living in Pelignos is benefiting from a system that treats people like cattle. Even having left, I still grew up with those advantages. The funds required to repair my hips after the horse fell on me, those came from the same system that victimizes the sprites."

"And I agree. But not everyone deserves to die for it. That's where Amora comes in. Maybe she can help deal with the pheromones. Maybe she can't. But I think she just might be able to keep the city from losing its collective shit once the sprites realize they hold the balance of power."

Val closed her eyes and pressed her face against my chest, "Is her power that wide-reaching?" she asked absently.

"Probably not. But she doesn't need to turn the city into a giant orgy. Let’s say she can only really affect as many people as would usually show up to that club of hers. Now take that power and dilute it across the whole city. The sprites might not throw down their arms and start making out with each other, but it should be enough to project some good vibes. It might be enough to make a sprite err on the side of mercy when they’re caught up in the moment and operating on instinct."

"What does she get for all this?" Val yawned, "And what if she decides she'd rather have it her way.

"Well, if she doesn't cooperate, Regina will eat her. Or I'll throw her off the roof."

"You wouldn't throw her off the roof," Val chided sleepily.

"Yeah, but she doesn't know that," I insisted, "Besides. She just wants to go home. Short of that, a place to live that doesn't suck too bad. Silk sheets, running water, good food, and she'll be happy."

"Mmmm, maybe you’re right. Maybe she's not so bad."

I stroked Val's hair and settled into a more comfortable position. It was clear I'd be here a while.

"Yeah, I thought it sounded like someone I know."

Val murmured something unintelligible in reply, and her breathing slowed gradually as she drifted off to sleep. I pulled the blankets up around her shoulders and settled back against the armrest with a contented sigh.

My gaze fell upon Val’s communication book, resting on the coffee table. Somewhere out there, Simon would be beginning to suspect. He’d have seen the smoke from the city as it burned, if not him, then one of his agents. Simon would expect word back from the fey in the coming days, and the longer he went without receiving it, the more likely it was he’d send a second party to investigate. A party that would have to find its way past the hotel.

As I lay there, stroking Val’s hair, I worked over the enchantment in my mind. If I was going to make this a permanent part of her body, then it was damn well going to be perfect.## TLDR Summary:

But I've got to say, even when you consider all the people trying to screw with us, I like this place a hell of a lot better than home." But I think she just might be able to keep the city from losing its collective shit once the sprites realize they hold the balance of power." Come to think of it, I think there was a police van in the parking garage where we ended up crashing the wagon we stole off the fey." Regina took a few steps back, as much to reassure Amora as to give her room to open the door, and fixed her huge leonine eyes on the demigod. After all, I could see all six fingers from the front, which left the thumb hooked around the back. Were I able to turn into an enormous green avatar of fury and smash all that offends me, the world would be a much better place. "I considered having her scrawl Property of Wallace or some other filth across the small of my back, but that seemed a little crass."

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