How I Made Billions Blogging! And So Can You!

in #satirelast year

      Two years ago I was a pathetic schlub with no money, no friends, and no future. One day, I was drunkenly perusing YouTube when I saw it. The video that changed my life forever! Now I'm wealthy beyond belief, full of future stuff, and I have so many friends I have to make up excuses to avoid them. Life is good. And yours can be too. I'll show you how.

Blog Your Way To Success!

      Skeptical? I was too...at first. Then I wrote my first post. I explained how we could solve the world's energy problem using a deck of cards, twenty three sour cream and onion potato chips, and a liter of Mountain Dew. Not knowing what to expect, I hit Post.

      The sound of my phone going off woke me the next morning. It was my ex. "You're all over the internet! Let's get together for lunch!" Confused, I turned on my computer to discover I had become a viral sensation. Everyone was talking about my energy solution. That first post earned me enough money to buy this house...

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I look a little drunk here. You would, too, if you lived in a party mansion. (1)

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      But it's definitely not about the money. Since that first post, I've solved numerous other issues that have plagued us throughout history and have helped thous- millions of people. And, in return, I've made a crap-ton of money! Just look at where I live now...!

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Patrolling the ramparts! (2)

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Comment Your Way To Riches!

      Not good at writing? No worries! With my system you can earn money simply by leaving comments on what other people post. I'll show you step-by-step how to write guaranteed money-makers. Writing such gems like...

"Nice references."
"Followed and resteemed. You do same."
"I like this."
"5"

      ...has made me enough money to finance some of the most expensive hobbies there are.

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That's three for me! (3)


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I'm so successful I drive two cars at once. (4)


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Proof of yacht. (5)


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I'm so successful I catch two fish at once. (6)

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Upvote Advantage!

      As if that wasn't enough. If you act now, you'll be enrolled in our exclusively private Upvote Advantage Club! Membership grants you rewards just for upvoting other people's posts or comments. It's that simple. What are you waiting for! Your fortune awaits! Sign up today!

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Almost forgot to brag about my action figure. (7)


Disclaimer:

Results not typical.

A special thank you to all of the friends I've made here on Steemit over these last two years. Without you I wouldn't still be here. I can't even imagine where I'll be in another two years. Keep on Steeming on!

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Attribution:


(1) This picture has been modified from the original and is used under PixaBay License
(2) This picture has been modified from the original and is used under Pexels License
(3) Giphy.com
(4) Giphy.com
(5) This images is a derivative of "Fishing on a yacht in the Indian Ocean XOKA3214s" by [email protected] and is used under CC BY 2.0
(6) This images is a derivative of "Fishing on a sailing yacht, Andaman sea near Phuket XOKA3150s" by [email protected] and is used under CC BY 2.0
(7) This picture has been modified from the original and is used under PixaBay License

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Thank you, Snook!

Sort:  

I like this.

😜😜😜


Only a legit baller can drive two Corvettes at once!! 😂

Disclaimer:
Results not typical.

So I may not get my own action figure? 😢

Congratulations on your 2nd Steem Anniversary, Omra! You've done so much to be proud of in your time here. That you have made so many terrific and supportive friends is the best blessing and I'm very happy for you. 🤗

Here's to your even greater success in this coming year! 🍷

Next you'll be buying your own island. 😆

Thanks! If you follow my proven system I guarantee that you might possibly have your own action figure. An island shaped like an O? It was meant to be. 🤔

pocketsend:[email protected], play around with the token of fun - POCKET!

Successful Send of 11
Sending Account: pode
Receiving Account: omra-sky
New sending account balance: 267759
New receiving account balance: 10
Fee: 1
Steem trxid: 8cf8ffb8637f75ab35904ee8403d6de99565dcb0


pocket-logo.png

Someone sent you some POCKET tokens. POCKET is an experimental sub-token system which operates on the Steem blockchain. It's like having a custom token without SMT. You can also send some to someone else by just commenting on a post with the following command: pocketsend:[email protected]_name,memo for example to send 10 tokens to @pocketjs, make a comment starting with: pocketsend:[email protected],This is a gift

I am running Pocket-JS confirmer code.

This was gold!!!!!!

I wish I had seen your method before I stopped posting!!!

I could have had a castle too!!!
😂😂😂😂😂😂

Thank you so much! My system will work on any platform...assuming your credit card is approved. 😁

You have received 5x upvotes from the members of @steemexplorers from your free link submission in our discord server. Steemexplorers is an initiative bringing information on various Steemit services and communities in a central discord to save you time and help you grow. It's free, it's easy, and it's here to help you in so many ways. Come by our discord to learn more! Link to Discord: https://discord.gg/6QrMCFq. Our team also offers an additional upvoting service called @givememonsters where you can presently trade in 1 to 10 DEC from the Steem Monsters game for up to $0.03 upvotes on ANY steemit posts. The vote purchasing value here is some of the best returns on your investments that you can find anywhere so come by and visit this service today!

Now that's funny! Proof of yacht, hahaha, brilliant!

Thank you, my friend!

You got voted by @curationkiwi thanks to Omra-Sky🌛💨! This bot is managed by KiwiJuce3 and run by Rishi556, you can check both of them out there. To receive upvotes on your own posts, you need to join the Kiwi Co. Discord and go to the room named #CurationKiwi. Submit your post there using the command "!upvote (post link)" to receive upvotes on your post. CurationKiwi is currently supported by donations from users like you, so feel free to leave an upvote on our posts or comments to support us!
We have also recently added a new whitelist feature for those who would like to support CurationKiwi even more! If you would like to receive upvotes more than 2x greater than the normal upvote, all you need to do is delegate 50 SP to @CurationKiwi using this link.

This post has received a 3.13 % upvote from @drotto thanks to: @curationkiwi.

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 i enjoyed that very much. This is how i lure victims to steemit tbh. I flashed them my bling2 and huge mansion i bought from blogging 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Thank you! 😁

OMG! This is hilarious Omra! Hell, I would settle for catching 2 fish...at once, of course. You are too much Omra. LOL! Happy 2 years and I am so happy that I met you. Thanks for all of the laughs. Hugs!

Thank you my friend. Just trying to pay you back for all the times you make me smile. 😊

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