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Most of the time, we go into a relationship without knowing what is expected of us. We don't just go into it, because we feel lonely, or because we feel age is catching up with us, we need to go into it, fully understanding the basic principles governing it.

When you make a marital decision, make it with tomorrow in mind, because tomorrow is longer than today.

BASIS OR FUNDAMENTAL FOR RELATIONSHIP.

1. Be interested in the basic/the process.

Everything in life involves process. We should always have this in mind, when dealing with your partner. With varying background and experiences, trying to mould them into what we want, takes time. We have certain expectations, but we should allow process take its course. There is a "how" in a relationship. Don't expect him to act like a husband, when he is still a fiancee, and don't expect her to act like a wife, when she is still a fiancee also.

2. You must anchor your marital decision on God's plan for your life.

How would you know who to choose if you don't know God's plans for your life? Most of the time, we allow our feelings to take the center stage, rather than seek His face. God always leave us with tiny details, to tell us what He expects us to do, and often time, we ignore it.

When God is telling you to let go, and you don't want to. He might allow that person to hurt you so much, that you won't have any choice than to let go.

God never leave us, without warning signs.

3. Your decision is often dependent (influenced) on your sense of identity.

A King would always marry a Queen. How you choose is a reflection of how you think about yourself. Who you go after, determines how you value yourself, and what you have going in on your head.

Anyone a King marries, get transformed, to live up to the potential of the kingship in him, and vice versa.

How do you see yourself?

4. Your relationship with God is more important than your relationship with men.

Most of the time, I have seen and heard many people, leave out their virtues and beliefs, because they don't want to lose a person. You are first God's son/daughter, so that should always count for something. You are to please God first, and every other thing can fall into place.

5. Don't honour a man, more than you honour God.

Don't reduce God to a man, and don't increase a man, to God.

6. A man who is not aware of God's plan for your life will never appreciate your worth.

If you don't know the value of a thing, you can't appreciate it. When you both look at each other, what do you see? Do you see potentials, in line with how you value yourself? Do you believe in each other? If you choose, based on needs, lonely state, and age, then it requires extra effort, to truly appreciate the worth of your spouse.

7. Needy people are always needy.

Relationship is for givers and not for takers. You can give without loving, they say, but you cannot love, without giving. Don't use human being to meet the needs only God can meet. That is why, choosing a partner, based on needs, is a wrong call. Needy people are high maintenance.

8. The greatest hindrance to fulfilling God's plans for your life, are those closest to you.

Those who are close to you are those who have greatest influence on your life. Be careful who you choose as friends, and even as future partner. They always have a way of getting to you. Their words always worth and mean much more.

9. Successful relationship is between two forgivers.

It was said that, the best relationship is between, a blind husband, and a deaf wife. Letting go is key in any relationship. Letting go involves forgetting the past. You need to be able to forgive easily and move on.

Love means, having to say sorry, without asking why.

If you ask the "why", be sure you are ready for the answer. Hahahaha.

10. The safety of a relationship is when a man can be reached by God.

You have to be accessible to God. When the chips are down, when it feels you have made the worst decision with the kind of partner you chose, you have to be able to reach God, and be reached by Him. Prayer is not a monologue, but a dialogue. It involves two parties; God and man. Most of the time, all we do is, pray to God, forgetting that, we should tarry still, in His presence, to receive our answer(s).

If there is a man to pray, there is a God to hear.

Be available, only then can you weather the storm that would arise.

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Thank you for your time.

My pen doesn't bleed, it speaks, with speed and ease.

Still me,

Olawalium; (Love's chemical content, in human form). Take a dose today: doctor's order.