What is Envy and how i Handle That Feeling

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Envy is a trait that human always have. Envy is a feeling of under-appreciate the good things we have while compared to others. I myself cannot denied also have it. we all have it and feel envy sometimes. In my personal experience as an envy person that often happen between relatives that having a higher status/ success. Although it's cannot be shown as direct action as it is more intent toward ourselves, acting like a poison that spread slowly into within. Feeling anger and desperate for some respect from other party and yet we did not get it. while that feeling can be accumulated into some outburst of action we regret later. though it can be notice by non verbal language if we notice it or a some praise that hide some hostile word toward envied target.

"Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies"
Gore Vidal.

While Envy cannot be denied can happen at anytime, mostly it can be cause by a childhood experience that occur due to unfairness of attention from past relative such as family or childhood friend, lack of attention from others, and sense of belonging that cant be achieve in early life. as we grow older we tend to crave for "lack of attention" feel by seeking more attention by other, more sensitive to others attention because their moments of satisfaction and gratitude are rare or nonexistent in the past life “ I was not have/feel it before, now I want to feel/have it” they are always telling themselves.

A person that prone to envy due often compare others for his/her achievement. if it does not fit with his/her inferior criteria is considered as a treat that "must be eliminated" so to speak. while it can be negated but mostly envious person always fall for this feeling. thats why envy person do happy to a envied person fall into some trouble instead feeling sympaty. keep in mind this feeling can be transform into destructive or improving action depend on person traits (such as patience, greed, pessimism, cruelty and etc) .

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In the past era, Envy can lead into a violence act way back from story of Cain and Abel from the Old Testament Bible. Cain felt envy and jealous for a praise that God given toward Abel more than himself. So, Cain kill his own brother in order to satisfy his feeling. In the modern era. Things is little bit changed. Envy is more likely become in-direct and subtle. Social media is one example that can new breed of envy that can be trigger by looking at someone else achievement and success. This new way of self-fulfilling achievement that person (mostly narcissistic type person ) can disguise to trigger someone with a people with inferior status and show his/her superior social status to get more attention.

For a fictional example ; some people often post a photo with him/her self lean back on his/her newest tesla model and briefcase full of case of cash showing of his success achievement. though we cant judge it but often do it's trigger some hostile or mostly envy comment in it. but for some people (narcissistic person) it just a way to seek an attention.
maybe someone who did not appreciated our talent/skill due to envy can lead such as irrational decision, for example ; afraid of some people superiority, he/she got bad relationship or even get fired from the company because the boss feel treated that might the talented employee/inferior position within company company. this case can be different while it similar can happen within our workplace as people in similar position to intend back-stabbing other in order to get higher status/position in company.

While there's a merely a trait we all have. depend on each person, envy can be a tool that we can utilize to improve or destroy something with it. Envy can be projected into something positive as trajectory for our motivation to rise ourselves within hierarchy in social status. such case can be see in social media too. i give a fictional example such as ; Jane is an overweight person. she feeling envy when see her friend, Mary that was overweight too, but recently got her ideal body due her workout over long period time. instead dwell in envy feeling, Jane utilize her feeling to do the same thing as Mary to get her ideal body over a work out too.
this example might be different this short story but i know you get the point.

Destructive envy can lead into some irrational action. instead of let it as their motivation, reverse action is occurs. it can strike into within self as often dwell in depression and feeling unworthy of their talents, devalue themselves from the world as "i'm nothing" feeling for everything its been done. If it's continuously feel can be suicidal as there's no purpose of our life in this world as it is already been taken by others. Acting as it's world already end for itself. on the other one. destructive envy most commonly can be more "outward" action, it's already self explanatory like Cain and Abel story and i'm sure there's also news about crime regarding envy feeling in news/media or - hater on comment in social media like youtube and stuff- .

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HOW I HANDLE THIS ENVY FEELING

I am not an expert in Pyschology but i love to learn form other opinion how to handle this feeling from you..
I myself as a victim of this feeling sometimes felt sudden depression in everyday. Resentment that appear is unbearable since i was kid until present day. Being inferior and bullied since childhood made me felt unworthy of being alive. Writing this topic though made me uncomfortable yet it's a self reminder for me that i still managed to handle this feeling.. i hope this will help ;

• Making contents, making content is same like create an achivement and it's produce an dopamine for our brain that atleast can relieve this envious feeling and stay positive.

• Learn something new , why bother somebody while we can improve ourselves by learn something new. in this case i can also forget my subject of being envy and quit busy compare to others.

• If i felt Envy, try to fight it with some intention to Learn something from it, it's very hard part but remember our feeling and mind is like a muscle that can be strengthen overtime so instead of negative try to learn how the person achieve his/her achievment rather than feeling down.

• Quit Compare our inferiority with other's superiority, i always feeling sad when see my friend success while i supposed to be happy. i hate that feeling though it can reside myself at the same time. instead thinking about that, i always struggle to fight that feeling and give and appreciation that we all have uniqueness and i must remind that is a thing to be cherished not to be envied..

• i know it's alot and it's been struggle for me to handle.. but i love to see your thought about how to handle envy feeling.

The Bottom Line :
As technology may evolved and change, envy always been us since beginning of time. we all have it. we as human is unique and can interpret some other's action in different way. it's up to ourselves to choose what the end result might be. it can be learning development as we compare ourselves with other or it can be a 'spark of fire' that can cause a chaos in relationship/others.

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