First impression, second impression... wrong.

First exposure to someone or something new brings with it a call for judgement. On limited information and well before any conscious processing takes place, evaluations, weightings and labels are placed which have very little relevancy or substance to them. A very large brush is used to paint a picture of immeasurable depth and complication that even with all its similarities, is unimaginably unique.

Yet based upon this first judgement call, our following thoughts and actions are manipulated into behaving in a certain way. When positive, we are more open, trusting, accepting, friendly, social, willing, flexible. If negative, the opposite occurs. Actions become short, guarded, cold and unbending.

An unknown exotic food that is offered on a spoon is met with caution and a face that is prepared for distaste. Yet, an apple is approached with an expectation of sweetness. When the first bite is taken, the broad brush narrows as senses start to process the actual experiential details and if they align with what is considered enjoyable or meet expectation, all is well. Expectations are important to note here.

Expectations are a part of our value system. We expect things to be and act a certain way and generally, that way is the way in which we would like to view ourselves. Our ideals, but not necessarily the way we actually are.

So why are first impressions wrong? They aren't. Wrong and right are concepts we apply to our world for understanding, separation and psychological comfort. We use these value systems to praise or punish and when we do so according to our values, we feel that our judgments are justified. Often, when we are fast to judge as negative, we move on without even a glance back and because there is no feedback loop, we judge our evaluations as correct and feel confident in our abilities to observe, consider and appraise.

But what kinds of things do we actually base our first snap judgments on? What someone is wearing, their hair style or shoes? The look of their face or skin or perhaps its color? How much useful information can be garnered from such things when observed in a snapshot moment? Do we have the sensitivity to understand that some of these things are transient and others offer very little indication as to the nature of that particular individual?

So what about our second impression, surely that must come from a better position. Probably not. It is possible that it comes from an even worse position than the first as the first has already cemented itself in the psyche and will add bias to any judgement thereafter. Especially if the judgement was negative. This is why they say to always make a good first impression, because a poor one can last a lifetime.

But what is a good way to judge? Perhaps there is no perfect way because judgement will always create a line of best fit however, it is also impractical and potentially dangerous not to judge. A better way may be to look at the risks with any one judgement in the situation and consider the potential and probability to be right or wrong.

When faced with a new food, is it possibly poison, is there a risk of death? If the only risk is a bitter taste that can be rinsed away with a beer, taste it.

If meeting someone new and it happens to be after midnight down a side alley, err on the side of caution and remain on guard.

If it is a meeting at a party, hold back judgement and get to know the person at least to some greater level as the risk of harm is low.

You get the idea. Be aware, carry a healthy dose of curiosity and, self-understanding. Judgement used to protect life and limb should be exercised to the best of one's ability. Judgement used to protect one's ideas can be set aside to allow for new information to present itself. Consideration and investigation, environmental sensitivity and compassion can be applied liberally.

Understanding the potential for bias before the experience goes a long way toward combating the blindness.

Taraz
[ a Steem original ]