RE: Living With Mindfulness: It is not Always About YOU!
The situation with your sister-in-law is kind of funny to me. Personally it would't bother me to live with such a person. In fact i do not like any attention drawn towards me, so if she can be the center of attention rather than me, it works just fine.
The only time i have an issue with self absorbedness is when it comes to helping people and doing things that actually make a real difference. like i was reading a psychology book today about people's behavior in good samaritan situations. it said that people usually refrain from helping strangers in distress because there are other people are around (and some other reasons). I was thinking how selfish can people be? its not about how you feel when you have to help others in emergencies. Just do it.
In the case of my sister-in-law, the problem mostly was that my wife and I both have very busy lives... and didn't really have TIME to drop everything we were in the middle of in order to be front and center in her eternal chaos.
Naturally, we're both helpful people... when help is really needed; but not so much when it is mostly attention seeking... and disrupts our own flow. Think of it is this way: If you end up getting sacked from your own work because of someone else's constant neediness keeping you from doing your job properly... who's really helped by that?
Woah, that sounds really dire. Thats a tough one because its family and you can't just keep them out of your life. But if the person is not a child they should not become such a heavy burden for you guys. i wouldn't know what to do except tell her to get her own place. Come up with a good excuse .