MORNING REVELATIONS: SELFISHNESS v. SELF-LESS-NESS

Becoming Self-Less instead of Selfish . . .

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Morning Revelations

Every morning I seem to discover something new that changes my perception especially as it pertains to my ideas of family and relationships. Take this morning. It was made clear to me yesterday by my old friend but new girlfriend, that no one can make me do or feel anything.  I am completely in charge of that activity by my lonesome.  

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But now, I have to say that I cannot be willfully ignorant. Once I learn that some behavior of mine is a waste of time or that I am misinterpreting something, I take the steps to correct that behavior. And I am an advocate of “retraining” myself to be more aware.  I am always surprised when someone points out a character flaw or trait that I seem to exhibit.  But what really surprises me is when I revisit old behaviors without being consciously aware of doing so!

You see, I am trying to become self-less. I want to eliminate the word “I” from my vocabulary.  Children begin their primitive toddler-hood being selfish. They have to be taught to be self-less by their parents who, if they are not mature themselves, will be too selfish to teach them. So by degree, we are all selfish to one extreme or another depending on how we are raised. 

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The Products of Selfishness:

Here’s a makeshift list. If you examine your own behavior you will find many more products.

Divorce

Single Parenting when both parents are still alive

Believing that someone else “makes” you do anything

Stepping into traffic with a sense of entitlement as if you are immune to being hit by a vehicle

Racing to the cashier to beat out someone who is actually closer

Berating and Bullying others

Passively slowing everyone down because you need to control others 

Withholding vital important information because you don’t like someone

Always talking about yourself and how you feel

Always putting yourself first 

Exhibiting Entitlement Behavior 

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Ironically, the same mechanism for defeating Depression is used for becoming Selfless. Do things for others without seeking any acknowledgement for what you have done. Go and sweep your neighbor’s gutter and keep it to yourself. Pick up the trash in someone else’s or even EVERYONE else’s lawn. Don’t tell ANYONE you did it. Tell No One. That’s the key. That’s the Trick. And if you are Depressed, after doing something for someone else, you won’t be able to go back to being depressed. It always works. 

Always do a good job; your BEST regardless of what you do. Stop seeking acknowledgement or approval from others. Practice being Selfless. And you will feel AMAZING as soon as you do. You will have nothing but good days and your conflicts will disappear.  

Until tomorrow morning . . . .