Finally, I got to leave a comment here :) I really like your post. It has so many aspects, I wouldn't be able to comment them all and there is no need to. You got me thinking anyway :)
I want him to be a person of integrity more than anything else. He did not build a habit where he consistently learns for tests. This is going to cause him some troubles, but he must find his way to succeed in what is expected from the system and how much he is serving it and how much resisting it.
I honestly think this is the best lesson someone could have out of the educational (or any other) system.
But then I persuaded myself to look at the situation from another perspective - not from a victim point of view but from a more willingly one to deal with a problem. I always will face various kinds of problems and this will only end, when I die.
I like this way of thinking. It is soothing somehow. I wish I have adopted it already, but unfortunately, I still get frustrated when problems occur.
Thank you.
It caused me trouble in the past when I was resisting too much on one hand and gave too soon in on the other hand. We are so not used to call for resources and skills of other people and rather see them as opponents. I am still in the process of unlearning this habit.
Within the work with my clients I use what actually supported my own view as well. That every incident or day contains a certain amount of smooth running encounters as well as disturbing ones. So I am telling them: "Count in around 20-40 percent of things which are going to frustrate you. Take this as normal. If you accept this as a rule of life, you'll build up a better tolerance towards frustration."
I am trying to follow my own advice :) - yes, it is soothing. So good that you see it this way.
Do you work with clients or patients, too?
No, I am not counseling clients. I used to train children and teachers in soft skills and mindsets (like emotional intelligence skills, growth mindset etc), but right now I am on maternity leave. I am planning (and hoping) to start a counseling practice in a year or two, but we will see how things go :)