It's funny because sometimes we find ourselves in these epic battles with the ROUS' and we emerge torn yet victorious, only to pause and ponder... Why did we even fight back. Likewise we pause and move thoughtfully and deliberately to avoid being sucked under the quicksand, only to pull ourselves free to forget why we saved ourselves. I've spent many hours hiding in the darkness from irrational fears only to wonder why I just didn't succumb. So often giving in seems appealingly like rest awaiting. I wish I had the nobility to say that I persevere to serve others despite the pain, and I have increasingly focused my life on the needs of family and employees and clients. However, from my teens, the first motivation for not letting go of everything was simply because I chose to see life as a game. Like a cruel obstacle course. My mantra became... I can do it tomorrow. Now that's not as motivational as it sounds. It wasn't that tomorrow I would rally and turn the tide that threatened in my mind to drown me... It was more that tomorrow I can quit and give up. But today, I'll try to endure. I guess I'm lucky that with the physics of space time, tomorrow has never arrived... It's always today. So, I play on. Hardly inspiring, but I have healed so much, that anymore, I don't much think of quitting the game any more. So, new t shirt idea. "Do your okayest today... There's always tomorrow.". Most won't get it, but that's okayest too.