Psych 101: The Temptation to Project in Cyberspace

Projection is a modern psychological term, used most often by Jungian analysts, that refers to the way in which we may mistake aspects of our own inner reality for aspects of the world outside (and particularly other people). It can explain, for example, how some people can “fall in love” (i.e., become infatuated) so completely – and quickly – that it’s bewildering to others. When we project, our perception of the world always contains come elements of pure fantasy.

Many relationships fail because the people involved never become aware of the ways in which they’re projected on each other. We aren’t seeing other people for who they really are when we’re caught in the grip of projection. We also run the risk of losing sight of ourselves. 

Although projection always operates in our daily interactions to some extent, the Internet has greatly expanded the opportunities that we may find for it. In the world of cyberspace it’s easy to become acquainted with people who we know very little about. Oftentimes they may not even be going by their real names. This creates a powerful breeding ground for projection, which typically serves as the mind’s way of “filling in the gaps” of our knowledge. We may not even be able to discern how clearly we’re seeing another person. How much of our perceptions are merely our own fantasies being superimposed upon reality?

The Internet – particularly its social media aspects – can entice us with the notion of instant gratification. We may receive quick responses to various things that we express online. How much of this is genuine? When we’re in someone’s physical presence we have many more cues – tone of voice, body language, eye contact, etc. – to give us some indication of what he or she is really thinking and feeling. Clear knowledge then crowds the fantasy out of our minds. But it’s much easier to project upon words on a computer screen accompanied only by an avatar.

Avoiding this trap requires us to be self-aware in the moment. Are we seeing other people the way that they really are, or are we seeing them through the veil of our own unfulfilled desires and needs? Being preoccupied with how our contacts in cyberspace are responding to us can pull us out of where we are in the moment. We become caught up in the chase, and oftentimes what we’re chasing is an illusion.

Many people are attracted to cyberspace because of the opportunities for projection that it affords them. We can create a persona – including an invented name and “identity” to go with it – that cultivates an air of mystery instead of revealing how we really are. This encourages others to project their fantasies upon us. But in the end, what do we really gain by drawing people to us through such means? We will have to let people see us as our ordinary selves sooner or later. 

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