Til Morning - Original Poetry
A prisoner in my home
The monster under my bed
I know its there
I've seen its glare
Please don't take me
Hoping our eyes don't meet
One eye open
Til daylight I'm coping
A prisoner in my home
The monster under my bed
I know its there
I've seen its glare
Please don't take me
Hoping our eyes don't meet
One eye open
Til daylight I'm coping
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nice poet
Thank you!
Very powerful opening! Had me curious throughout the entire poem! Well done :)
The monster, from my interpretation, is a metaphor for our mind; the constant clutter of our thoughts which come alive at night. I love the part about eyes meeting, it shows how the tiniest of eye-contacts with this monster can result in very grievous states, both mentally and physically.
Yea, the theme is from a childs point of view, so I tried looking at it from that aspect, but its been a while since I looked at things that way. Glad I was able to capture the message I was hoping for. Thanks for the comment!
:) You're welcome! Indeed you did capture the message perfectly! Keep it up :)
Thanks for participating in the One Human Basket! 🙏
Wonderful poem - I was tense the whole way through, luckily to be relieved abruptly. 👌
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Happy you enjoyed! I am working on something for your contest, just need the time to work it out properly.
Wow, crisp and to the point, I like it! =)
Glad you enjoyed it! :)
I'm just wondering, does the monster accept SBD when you pay it ? Really I love this! My monster lived in the wall furnace at the end of the hall!
Dunno, maybe that will buy ya some time lol. Mine lived in the closet in front of my bed.
Did I mention that the furnace was just across from my bedroom door? LOL It cast orange flickers across my door ...
Way into my adulthood I admitted that that's where many of my restless sleepless nights came from and my mother came unglued.
"Why didn't you just tell us?"
"Well you couldn't move the furnace."
"No. but we could have painted your door differently so that it didn't catch the light! Or we could have hung something on the door."
But it significantly proved the point I was trying to make to my siblings:
Don't be so quick to judge what's really bothering your children at night because they probably aren't really telling you.
Yea, as a kid you see things differently, especially "monsters".