Even though you've accepted almost none of my edits, I like this piece. I think it is one of your best ones, with nary a line wasted, or things that are missing. The images come strong and clear, and more importantly, the feeling does as well.

They dance and laugh
while the daylight lasts.

These two lines in particular are gorgeous. They flow so well together they almost feel as if they rhyme, though they do not. Liquid laughter, these two are.