I feel the turn begins the stanza prior, and here it's already despair. But despair sets in, and sets in deeper. Here, no longer looking for her, but just for memories of her presence. There's already the giving up here, in what the search is for.

And thank you for the kind words Jess. Someone joked I could start a book of poetry with my poems for @mamadini, but it seems like at the rate it is going, it might very well come true. And of course, thanks to my muse <3