So right bro! Good piece... I like the way you break the sentences, it gives special meaning and cuts the feeling to the minimum number of words, which is an art form in itself imo.
This reminds me of one of the feedback's you have given me.
It doesn't need
to announce itself
as such.
This can be speak to many things - people as well. You know someone is good at their job not because they say they're good at it, not because they advertise and fit into a stereotype - but simply cause they bring results. Lesson: let the poem talk in whatever voice it wants.
This post has been selected for curation by @msp-curation by @sunravelme. It has been upvoted and will be featured in this week's Curation for Creatives post. It will also be considered for the official @minnowsupport curation post and if selected will be resteemed from the main account. Feel free to join us on Discord!
Thanks for reading. Editing a poem doesn't mean destroying it in any way. It means sharpening it so it penetrates the mind of the reader in a more effective way. I love those poems which pop right out of the ground too, but it's amazing what cleaning them up and chipping the mud off can do.
I agree but don't have the grammar background and now the brain power...long story........to chip them off the way the should be........
hope that makes sense.....
I drive my son nuts when I write poem-y things because I don't follow any rules.......but then again I never set out to write a poem......just sometimes they come......
so I usually don't tag something as a poem...but I did win 2 poem contests .........
and yes, this is how I talk in real life......I get easier to understand the more you get to know me. lol
Hello @damianjayclay.
You made good use of soliloquy in the above excerpt in your poem - modern poem
Indeed, good poetry isn't more like a friend but it is a friend depending on the poet and how he/she wants the readers to view it as...
Even a blind man whose sight cannot see the lyrics of a good poem would give a good poem a thunderous ovation.
Kudos Mentor!
I realize now,
Your poem breaks the fourth wall,
Wow! That’s so meta,
Cheers!
Haha, well spotted. I wondered if anyone would notice.
Nice one. I guess you don't get to add #editedbyclay when you wrote it yourself :)
#clayeditsclay
That would be somewhat pretentious lol.
So right bro! Good piece... I like the way you break the sentences, it gives special meaning and cuts the feeling to the minimum number of words, which is an art form in itself imo.
Thank you :) Glad you enjoyed this one.
This reminds me of one of the feedback's you have given me.
This can be speak to many things - people as well. You know someone is good at their job not because they say they're good at it, not because they advertise and fit into a stereotype - but simply cause they bring results. Lesson: let the poem talk in whatever voice it wants.
Thanks for the thoughtful analysis, as always :)
It's always my pleasure!
This post has been selected for curation by @msp-curation by @sunravelme. It has been upvoted and will be featured in this week's Curation for Creatives post. It will also be considered for the official @minnowsupport curation post and if selected will be resteemed from the main account. Feel free to join us on Discord!
I'm afraid to read your posts....
I like when poems just pop into my head.......
but I would also like to learn more about poems.......so have you bookmarked to read with care loll
Thanks for reading. Editing a poem doesn't mean destroying it in any way. It means sharpening it so it penetrates the mind of the reader in a more effective way. I love those poems which pop right out of the ground too, but it's amazing what cleaning them up and chipping the mud off can do.
I agree but don't have the grammar background and now the brain power...long story........to chip them off the way the should be........
hope that makes sense.....
I drive my son nuts when I write poem-y things because I don't follow any rules.......but then again I never set out to write a poem......just sometimes they come......
so I usually don't tag something as a poem...but I did win 2 poem contests .........
and yes, this is how I talk in real life......I get easier to understand the more you get to know me. lol