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RE: Steemitpoetrycontest-#13-WITCHES POWER
I like the musical quality of this poem, hinging around the refrain of "This song, this tune, this moon". If a poem can be said to be "catchy", this one is. The theme also has an ominous quality to it, like a prophecy that may or may not come to pass... really interesting :)
That said, I would like to offer one small critique (and please tell me if I'm overstepping): I don't think you need to say "with swift", you can simply say "for your day of glory comes swift". It makes more sense and also fits the meter better ;)
thanks for the critique, i appreciate it.....i have taken note of your comment and would improve on my writing in my next submission....cheers
Oh good, I hoped it would be helpful and not an unwelcome comment. Please feel free to ignore if it doesn't take the writing where you want it to go. I edit my own poems ruthlessly, often even after they are posted! On my entry for this contest, I think I went back and edited the whole thing like 4 or 5 times after it was already entered in the contest 🤣
that's interesting. such ruthless dedication to producing a piece of worth!