You are viewing a single comment's thread from:
RE: Lacrimosa [Original Poem - Reflections #1 Mixed Media Collaboration Contest]
These words weigh deep, man. Like a cloud of dark matter hitting the ocean. Great job :)
These words weigh deep, man. Like a cloud of dark matter hitting the ocean. Great job :)
Thanks! That was indeed my goal here, to lay a heavy weight amidst your heart.
Mission accomplished! I especially appreciated the part,
"Weak are my limbs as I raise them
Splendid my innocent fall
Teardrops of years upon my heart
Drowns the burdensome memory of pain"
The cadence is so strong and resolute. Clear. Something especially pleasant in the first two lines that I can't quite put my finger on. Maybe some ratio in the syllables that just has a beauty to it.