Is my coming to being predestined, accidental or by choice?

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While i am not a supporter of pre-destiny, i wish to explore an idea that pops up on my head few minutes ago.

Here in Africa, there are many superstitions that are illogical and against reason. Despite this, some do come to pass whether by accident or by a force unknown to us.

One of such beliefs is the assumption that there are wrong wives and husbands. The Africans have these ideas that some people are not meant for each other. This explains why your mom/dad quickly consult a priest immediately you tell them you have someone you wish to marry.

These same people also believe that God gives people their missing ribs! This is evident in their prayers that God should give their children their missing ribs. This suggests, in logic that there is a woman for a man and a man for every woman out there.

My query now is, is it the case that the union between my mom and my dad was predetermined? If yes, to what extent? Just to give birth to me and separate or give birth to me and continue as husband and wife.

If such is predestined, it means my mom must marry my dad even if in reality they are not compatible. But i know believers are already thinking - God can't give you someone you are not compatible with.

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But we can also ask, if it is that predestined, why is it that some still don't work? Is it also part of the plan?

If my mom, by accident and against all odds defied this 'fate' (i am assuming there is something like that for the purpose of this argument), would i still come into existence (being)? That is, would i have been born by my mother still? For another man i guess? If yes, would i still be this 'me' or another version of myself? Would i have been given Juwon as a name or a different name? Would i have been an indegene of Ogun state?

If we remove destiny, we are left with accident and choice. People can meet by accident and can also marry by accident. By accident, i mean meeting briefly, having intimacy and getting pregnant. In such cases, the women are 'forced' to marry the man.

By choice, this is a situation where both parties weigh their options and decide to go into marriage. In this scenario, if anything happens in the long run, they will accept it was their choices. They agreed because they thought it would work but since it didn't work out, they would also agree and move on.

A becoming to being that is preplanned and predestined is illogical and deterministic (for me at least). It shows we are rendered powerless to make logical choices. It suggests also that the Supreme Being Knows and being the 'creator' decided to limit man.

Well you can say a designer decides the functions of the designed! If this is also true for man (creation), then we are being punished 'unjustly'!

Share your opinions on the topic.

Thanks for your time. Your boy @smyle the philosopher.