I guess I'm waiting for the rain
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I don't like complaining, not really, and I find very little value in doing so. I mean, no matter where you stand in life, in any aspect really, financial, emotional, or what have you; Every single one of us is standing in some sort of desert looking up to the scorching merciless sun.
I know it's not about fairness, it's not even about balance as much as I can subscribe to ideas of necessary contrasts to even understand, to grasp appreciation. I get all that, I'm not confused, but my skin is beginning to burn a little too much, and keeping the smiles happening, is a big burden.
My plea, my little battle is my own, and I'm fully aware there is nothing someone could do or say to make it magically disappear, I know that. But, screw it, I'm tired, I feel like screaming to the winds, and dammit I wish this sun would stop burning the skin of my back or at least that a big cloud would at least cover it's rays if only for a little while.
Funny thing is that tomorrow this could all change, tomorrow I could wake up and not have to worry about the next house payment or the one after that. Tomorrow It could be the day I tell all the debt collectors who blow up a phone that my brother is helping me keep active, that I do want to settle things, that I am ready to negotiate.... But today, today the sun is burning the skin off my back.
I often think of how many people gave up mere seconds before the rain started. How many people threw in the towel and lost the bout only because their will was lacking. Not because of talent, not because of misguided purpose, none of the obvious things, no.
I get so consumed by these thoughts that I even look for that version of me in a mirror, I want to make sure his reflection is not there, I don't want to be part of that group, the ones who gave up.... But today, the sun is just burning my back... and dammit... it hurts...
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I'm feeling it too bud. I'm waiting for something good to happen but everyday it gets a little bit more depressing. I know I should be writng. There was a time when I was writing four posts a day. Fiction stories and blog posts and everyday fun stories. People would read them and comment and it was a really fun time.
Now I come home from my restaurant and I can barely get a few sentences out. When I do spend hours on a story chances are nobody's going to read it or vote for it at all.
Makes me want to grab a beer and watch TV.......though I'd rather have a coffee and get to work.
Wow... I have to say, it is very rare that I find a comment that hits so close to home.
While I am not a writer at heart, I have been enthused with creating “content” (visual, audio, personal) for a long time. I haven’t been around on Steem long enough to feel the pain of the lack of engagement. However, I just got home from 7 hours at the pizza shop. And there’s no way I’m writing a long winded post, or making the art that I want to be making. I’m drinking wine and playing World of Tanks. But you know what, that’s fucking fine. Nothing to feel bad about. Some days you get up at 7, drink 3 cups of coffee, and write anything and everything that comes to mind. And some days, you work all day, get home, and drink a beer and watch the telly. No wrongdoing there. Do what you want; but more importantly, do what you need to do.
Keep your head up, there is a bright future for those who stay motivated, take their time, and stay true to who they are and what they need to do.
I hear you man. I drank some wine and ate some pizza. I cooked some chicken. I listened to MSP waves and @meno kicking off some hardcore convo with Mr. Harrison. I drank some beers after that even. Now I'm just chillin listening to some jams. A bad day turned into a pretty good night.
come find me on discord man... lemme show you a community that cares... i promise it will make a difference.
Ok. I'll contact you tonight on discord.
It'll rain eventually. We just gotta try to stay in the shade and wait out the drought. Much love bro.
Yo se que muchos lo hacen, lo han hecho y otros mas lo seguirán haciendo... Yo espero soportar un poco mas... Me encanta Steemit y tengo mi vida dedicada 100% a esta plataforma que me ha traído muchas satisfacciones.
Sigamos confiando en Steemit con la esperanza de que todo estará mejor PRONTO.
Let's keep on trusting Steemit in the hope that everything will be better SOON.
Connecting to others is showing that one is interested and cares. It is about taking time to give someone the time day because they matter. Thank you for sharing meno.
There are times when the strength is running out, not physical, psychological. Stress is a heavy burden, and life is rarely affectionate. You just need to keep still alive.
very true gor... Stress is a killer, and that's not hyperbole
You know, my dear Meno, just how much I understand.
It's a challenging world in which we live, at an exceptionally difficult time. The sensitive among us are struggling all the more – negotiating our own, inner landscapes while also coming to terms with oppressive realities that press upon us from outside.
I commend you for speaking truthfully – for saying the un-chipper thing – for allowing those of us who love you to join you in that place.
You are not alone. I am also...awaiting the breath-giving deluge that'll surely come to quench this excruciating thirst. We'll survive this – of that, I'm quite sure.
hugs,
xo, zippy
Totally feel that. I had my burning days also in the last period of time. Especially since the crypto market dipped even more. Too many dreams and wishes attached to this thing.
right there with you bud... right there with you.
It really is s a time of dispair, but for me it helps to think of the first great dip in Steemit, when it went down to only a few cents and many thought it was doomed. Those who endured and stayed have been greatly rewarded, and it’s because of one main thing; thinking long term.
This is what I’m trying to do right now. In the same time I have changed my mind set quite a lot because I don’t focus too much of what is happening on Steemit, but instead the others projects around it.
I still think great things are coming, we just have to be patient.
I'm not giving up dan... i'm just shouting at the void... that's it!!
still thinking long term..
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