When I was growing up, nobody gave me happiness lessons. Nobody told me the steps I should take in order to be happy. It seems like a kind of cultural blind spot. Everyone assumes happiness is a good thing, but so few people devote their time to it. I'm not going to claim to be the best happiness-er that exists, but I do know one thing: whatever you practise, you get better at.

All of us start in different places with different levels of talent and skill. But no matter how bad things are, we can always find ways to make things a little bit better. And from little things, big things grow.

Here are some things you can do and think to start to welcome happiness into your life. Some may work for you, others may not. However, try to approach them with the eyes of a child, without judgement, and with the willingness to experiment.

1. Wake up happy

Your alarm goes off in the morning. You have put it on the other side of the room, so you get out of bed to turn it off. You drink the glass of water and think about one thing which you are grateful for. You review the single simple goal that you wrote out the night before, and so you do 60 squats.

You look in the mirror and say out loud "Stand like a champ!" and follow your own advice. You say "Stand like you're ecstatically happy!" and you again comply. You laugh at the way you look in the mirror. You do some fist pumps and say "Yes, yes, yes!"

How good do you think your day will be, having started it like this?

2. Things mean things

I can breathe deeply. That means I'm happy. The sun is shining. That must mean I'm happy. I can hear the rain on the roof. That must mean I'm happy.

In Latin America, they have an expression which you might translate as "belly full, heart full". You have a delicious meal. Pause for a moment and enjoy the sensation of the food on your lips, the taste on your tongue, and the feeling of a full belly happily digesting your food.

You can choose what makes you happy in your life. If you have a long list of 25 items, each of which must be closely inspected and checked off before you can feel a moment of happiness, you are assigning happiness to something which must always be far away, and must not be enjoyed every day. Make the decision to find happiness a common thing, an ordinary thing, and something to enjoy every day.

Things mean things. They really do. But it's up to you to decide what meaning you want to focus on - what meaning you want to make more real.

3. Watch your words

The things you say can affirm something. They can make things more important, or less important. Your words do have the power to change how you experience things - to change your reality, so to speak.

If you say "I'm having a bad day," you have just declared that your entire day is going to be bad. Try saying: "I'm having a bad moment." By the time you've said it, the moment is already over.

Say life-affirming things to yourself, and to the people you meet. If you notice someone doing something exceptional, take a moment to tell them. What you encourage within yourself and others, grows.

Many people don't take the time to say nice things to people - not because they don't think them, but because they are afraid of how they will be perceived. They are afraid to be good. Don't be afraid to be good. Be good. My rule is: if something is true, and empowering to me or those around me, say it.

4. Surround yourself with happiness

If you want to learn German, you have to surround yourself with German materials - posters, books, music, movies, conversations. If you want to be happy, what must you do? It's your decision what you're going to surround yourself with, what you are going to give space and time in your life.

You have the choice of what music you're going to listen to. Are you going to listen to The Smiths, or are you going to listen to P-Funk? Are you going to listen to music which makes you question whether life is worth living - or music that shows you that it is?

Regrettably, creating a happy environment for yourself can sometimes mean saying good bye to old friends. That's a hard decision, but it's one you must make if you are going to clearly, consciously say "I am content," or "I am not content."

5. Meditate

It has been said that, if meditation were a new form of medication, for all of its health benefits, it would be lauded as a wonder drug. Meditation will help you find a deeper peace, so when your mind goes racing, it doesn't carry you with it, emotions and all.

Personally, I have had great results with mindfulness meditation. Try listening to the audiobook version of Eckhart Tolle's "Practicing the Power of Now" for an hour a day. Listen in English if you can, because it is read by Tolle himself, and you will be able to hear the intense calm in his voice.

6. Seek the advice of a happiness expert

If you have a friend who is a particularly happy person, ask them what their habits and attitudes are.

The mistake is to assume that this person is never sad or experiences negative emotions. But they are human. They do. But what do they do when they wake up on the wrong side of the bed? How do they turn their day around? Find out.

You'll probably notice that happy people are normally willing to share whatever tips they have - that might be another clue for you.

7. Maybe you won't always be happy

Maybe sometimes you need some time to feel sad, to take it slow, to reflect or just plain be lazy. Don't beat yourself up for that. Don't feel as if you're failed because you're not 100% happy all the time.

Being sad sometimes is part of living a happy life. Love yourself in the ups and downs.

Further Reading

"Practicing the Power of Now" audiobook by Eckhart Tolle

"Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway" by Susan Jeffers

"Awaken the Giant Within" by Anthony Robbins