RE: What Can We Do Besides Discipline//Punish Our Children?
When I hear a child whining I feel really sad because now I know it is a child begging to be honored. In the past the whining would get me feeling angry. Now, looking back, I realize that I was only angry because I was still a little girl not getting those early needs met. The anger came from being triggered, remembering I had nothing to give my children. How could I give them something I never had?
My own childhood trauma made me determined to not traumatize my own children. In hindsight I see how unrealistic that was. However, I am regularly seeing how I unintentionally abused my children but I now aid greatly in their healing as well as my own by being VULNERABLE and taking responsibility for what has occurred and where I am currently.
After living with the children at the Garden of Eden for a few years and interacting with them I see clearly how almost every child on the planet is being abused. Our kids showed me so many things about myself. I'm so grateful for @everlove and @quinneaker for showing me myself and how to rethink everything.
What a great, VULNERABLE response @loveon. I never considered myself abused, as I likely had one of the best childhoods of most anyone I know. I do now know what it means to honor a child, and believe that type of childhood would be preferable to any other childhood I could ever imagine. It's just the standards we have been living by as human beings are so low. Our parents parented similar to their parents, and we have learned to parent that way too. Even if we have intentions of doing things differently, the deeply ingrained patterns repeat themselves. Vulnerability, responsibility and communication are KEY!!
I love that you have seen what is possible and have taken to heart your own awareness, taking responsibility and steps to heal on many levels.
I am grateful for the example at the @gardenofeden and blessed beyond measure to be a part of a new paradigm of living. Thank you for your comment @loveon.
Because I love you I am going to be honest with you. As long as you continue to hold dear the idea that you had an abuse free, "best childhood" you will continue to be blind to your blocks. You survived by being the good girl and you're still doing it. It's no different than my fear-based blocks, being hyper-protective of myself. We're both caught behind a veil of delusion.
Truly grateful for your response. Big hugs and love to you.
Oh I'm not saying I wasn't abused, I said --" I never considerED myself abused, as I likely had one of the best childhoods of most anyone I know." And just because it was one of the best of anyone I know, doesn't mean there wasn't abuse going on. You and I both know that abuse is WAY more than what we have thought it to be, sometimes way deeper and often times more covert than the blatant beatings and rape that is generally acknowledged as abuse. There is no doubt that protecting myself by being the good girl has had lifelong implications. Gratefully I am amongst those in it for the long haul, questioning and holding space for healing for us all.
Thanks for your response @loveon. Hugs and love back your way.