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RE: Disciplining Children -- Questioning the Norm!
One problem is that people think that these 2 words mean the same thing: Discipline & Punishment
Discipline comes from the word "disciple". A disciple learns from example and time spent together. We are the example to our children. They will probably turn out to be a lot like us. So let's set a good example.
If our children see US doing all of the above, they will likely slowly mature and learn to do the same. Whereas if they see us "losing it" and screaming at them and smacking them over a childish mistake or something they did that so easily irritates us and sets us off -- then they will likely grow to learn the same behaviour that we have just displayed.
I think that the hardest part of parenting is that I am the one who has to finish maturing and discover why seemingly little things that they do can set me off sometimes. I need to be the grown up and stay calm and continue acting in a loving way. It can be hard. But it is not my child's fault their normal childhood behaviour bugs me so much. I have to discover my own faults first and work on improving them in order to be the parent that my children deserve.
I so agree with you @canadian-coconut. WE, the adults, are the ones that need to look within. If we cannot even deal with ourselves, how will we ever inspire a new generation? Looking at ourselves to see why things bother us so much is really ideal. It not the child's fault we ourselves have so many dysfunctions. Hopefully we learn before it's too late by infusing them with all our gunk!! I love hearing that you are aware of and taking responsibility for your own self. I'm so grateful for your perspective and your sharing your experience with us. Blessings to you @canadian-coconut.
I would agree that many people think they mean the same thing. I remember hearing when I was a child "Do as I say, not as I do!" Example is of utmost importance. Therefore, we must find the gems inside of ourselves first--actions speak louder than words. Thanks for your comment canadian-coconut!