Dear Diary: My Fellow Dialysis Patient Died The Other Day And Now He Is No Longer Suffering

My mother just revealed to me that my co-patient died already, the other guy that is coughing nonstop. I am not really so sad if my fellow dialysis patients die because it is better for them to just pass-away if their families won't or does not have the capacity to get them a kidney transplant because I do not want them to end up like me where I am in a deep trouble buried neck-deep and almost fully submerged in medical maladies.

That is why I do not also get so close with my co-patients for the fear of losing them will just make me feel at a loss although again I am happy that they will not suffer especially this current one that is coughing nonstop because there is a fluid in his lungs that will not or the nurses have no skills to completely take of from him.

His issues is mainly water in his lungs and the solution for that is only you know already, dialysis. He just needs to be drawn out with extra fluids until the water in his lungs recedes. It happened to me before and I cheated on my pre-treatment for my dialysis session when the nurse in the other center where I was treated before just asks how much I weighted prior then I would a little heavier than I am really just for an extra water to get taken out from my body.

It worked at several occasions which saved my soul from certain profound discomfort or even death. I still am suffering from fluids in the lungs but not that terrible that I would cough and cough non-stop. But my lung issue now probably contributes for my body to get weaker than it should be because of its decreased lung capacity.

Although my lung is weak at least it is resistant to pneumonia and other worse respiratory illnesses and I do that God because for one thing I do not want to die from not being able to breathe. I just want to die from my sleep and I hope that God would grant me that wish than letting me die while I am conscious, it is a terrible thing to happen..