I have a friend who is gay. And when we first met I was beyond careful in my attempts not to offend him. Then he blew my mind. He said and, I quote: "Man, stop being so weird about it, we grew up on the same block, seen the same fates and stories, just say it. Q***r, its easy. I'm not ashamed of what I am , the same way you dont get offended when I call you out for being an egoistic dick. Self acknowledgement. Very important :)