Sometimes you use what you have: my summer music video! (NO SHAME)
Guys, Steemit is sort of changing things for me in a way I didn't foresee or think was possible. It's amazing.
If you know my story at all, you know that I've struggled with a chronic fatigue issue for almost 7 years which was finally diagnosed as hypothyroid (among other things.. it's always interconnected, especially in women with our poor, little, delicate hormone systems). In that time, I managed to scrape through and finish my Master's degree and work with a record label, but at the end of it all, came up empty financially (and in many other ways) due to being too sick to properly work a job or get my music and other projects off the ground.
It's quite the thing when you keep getting on the horse but keep getting kicked off. That's more or less what my life felt like the last 6-7 years, no matter how hard I tried to fix things, and no matter how hard I worked in spite of being completely and utterly bone-tired exhausted and in the middle of a physical crisis.
Now, this isn't about complaining, however. On top of the fact that there were many things to be grateful for in that time in spite of the difficulties, I also recently wrote a post about how things often turn to "o happy faults," and it's hard to really know what is actually good or bad until the whole story plays out. Often the difficult things bring us to places where good things happen that otherwise couldn't have taken place. My work on Steemit, for example, is one of those things. And if cryptos take off like many of us hope, then that o happy fault will soon become o GLORIOUS fault.
The point is--we should always just do the best with what we've got and try to trust that we don't know the full story or what good may be coming.
It was in this spirit that I filmed the video below. All I had was my phone and a recorded track (not even mastered at that point). I knew it wouldn't come out professional quality, and I knew I couldn't make it what I wanted. But I was so tired of feeling stuck creatively, purely for lack of income, that I decided I was just going to do it, and ignore the judgmental onlookers who don't grasp just how challenging an artistic career is (even without the complexity of health problems!).
I didn't at this point know I could get an app that would help me get better quality on my phone; I didn't even know what settings would work better with the light. I just knew I wanted something simple and beautiful to go with one of my songs for the sake of doing what I could with what I had. I did, however, know that if I continued to not be able to do something artistic I was going to fold up inside and the discouragement and powerlessness would eat me up.
So I did it in one take and made it work.
And you know what? I absolutely know it's not perfect. But it expresses what I wanted to express, and I'm proud of myself for taking the creative risk to create it and put it up so more people might be introduced to my words and songs.
Watch to the end for a twist :). Lyrics below.
Keep Me Close - Kay Clarity
I have never seen such light before
I have never known such warmth
I have always fought to find my home
Never thought it'd find me first
You have given me what I had lost
Through the carelessness of them
All their broken deeds and lying love
You have built me back again
[interlude]
If I walk alone again tonight
I don't know where I will go
Where these streets will wind, what feet will find
If I'll lose me in the cold
So keep me close
At your side
Never go
I'll be fine
In the morning I will wake from sleep
As the colours cover me
No more black and white upon my skin
No more ice inside my bones
Copyright 2017.
xx,
Kay
P.S. This song along with other originals is available to stream and buy here. I am also always open to creative Steemit offers for songs/an album. Comment and we can work something out.
P.P.S. Did you come across my Christmas/winter playlist yet?
Hi Kay, I watched to the end. I like how you trained the video up toward the sky, as if to say, there's hope up there in heaven. You are very talented. I think the video came out well in its raw form. You're right on to say, "just go for it." You don't have to have all the professional effects to make powerful songs and videos. You are in a stage right now as a musician that can't be duplicated at any other time in your life. Keep going with it, and may God bless you richly in 2018!
What an awesome and encouraging comment. Thank you! :). And same blessings to you and yours!
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