The blonde on the train - Micro-fiction writing contest
The blonde on the train
She is the most beautiful girl that he has ever seen, with blond hair and white, smooth skin, dressed in a coat and dark glasses that gave her an air of mystery.
Jhon looked at her, exhorting in a dream, delighting in multiple fantasies, when suddenly the train stopped and the girl got off the train chased by Jhon's dreamy look.
When Jhon returned to the earthly world he looked that the woman had forgotten her purse under the seat, he ran to pick it up and looked out the window to warn the blonde, but the train was already moving, it was too late.
Two weeks have passed, and since then Jhon has taken the same train at the same time and from the same station waiting to find the blonde girl with the coat and glasses to give her her purse, he has always been curious to know what is inside, but he would never dare to find out.
Today is the day, he found the blonde at the train station. Stripping himself of him shyness, Jhon approaches her and gives her the bag, explaining their good intentions and pointing out to her that he never couldn't look inside.
The girl glances sidelong at him, thanks him dryly and leaves.
As she goes out, she checks the inside of her bag, looks at the artifact inside, knows why it failed and is convinced that next time it will explode.
This modest work has been written to participate in the Micro-fiction writing contest organized by @jayna. Come and participate.
Thank you very much for taking the time to spend and read, do not hesitate to leave your comment.
Oh my. Jhon did not realize he was carrying a bomb for several days. And he never found out!
I like your imaginative story, @darthgexe. One thing you could do to improve it a bit more is to make sure you use the pronouns “he”, “his” and “him” when referring to Jhon and “she,” “hers” and “her” when referring to the girl on the train. Nice job!
Sure, thanks for the correction, I'll be more careful with that in the future.
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STOPTo support your work, I also upvoted your post!
I like is amazing, I want participate in the competence.
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The story is simple. The opening is normal. The characters are nothing special. But the climax is mind blowing!
@darthgexe, I really enjoyed your micro fiction. Fantastic write-up!