The Negative And Positive Impact Of The #MeToo Movement

in metoo •  11 months ago

stefano-pollio-365695.jpg

In light of the whole #MeToo movement that has been hitting our interwebs the last few months, I felt it was time for me to speak (write) up about it.

Because I’ve had a weird relationship with it.
The whole thing.

Yes I am VERY happy that the ladies (and then later the gentlemen) started speaking up about their experiences of sexual assault and harassment.

I deeply believe that this has been an extremely positive move for our society as a whole.
To break down the barriers of this topic which is STILL very taboo and something as a collective we hide in the shadows because of the shame, embarrassment and judgement we (can) experience.

But at the same time it brought up A LOT of fucked up shit.

I am TOTALLY speaking of my own experience here.

Because I was seeing a shitload of sexual harassment and assault stories popping up, it opened up something inside which I have NEVER felt before.

For the first time in my life, I became afraid of men.

If I was walking alone on the street and there was a man walking behind me, I would become extremely aware of his presence and keep my eye on him, just in case he tried to do something.

I became distrustful of literally every man I came across.

I had little panic attacks because a man had looked at me in a leering nasty way.

It was not good.

The only man that I could completely trust was my own guy.

And I believe this happened because I suddenly became fully conscious of the extent of sexual shit that we as a collective have gone through.

And fuck that shit hurt SO much.

It’s pretty hard for me to put this down in words because there are A LOT of feelings involved here.

I had to surrender to the pain, hurt and sadness I was feeling in order for it settle down into its own space in my being.

It wasn’t a very pleasant experience but it made me look deeply at the men that I have in my life.

It feels as if men have been put in a bad light by all these stories, and my soul will not rest with this.

Because it is simply not true.

There are A LOT of good men out there.

Men that are good who have in the past also done bad things in varying degrees to women.

Men that have a deep respect for the womenfolk of this world.

And you know why I know this?

Because I am surrounded by REAL gentlemen who deeply love and respect women.

And I want to celebrate them!

Because fuck, they are the glimmer of hope in a sometimes dark world.

Don’t believe me?
Read this.

My man who is mega deeply compassionate, understanding and loving towards my own sexual harassment stories and completely holds space for me to tell them and to move through the experience.

My male friend who has a box of tampons in his toilet because he wants his female buddies to not have to worry about that shiz if they are at his place.

My other friend who will NEVER EVER EVEN kiss a woman unless he asks her beforehand if he is allowed to do that.

The construction worker who came to my office and was completely immersed in my stories of using natural birth control and menstrual cups as he was looking for alternatives for his girlfriend.

The men that I work with who will stick up for me and put other men in their place if they are being rude, patronizing or demeaning to me.
(Obviously I stick up for myself too but their support is extremely welcoming)

Just to name a few.

I feel that it is up to EVERYONE (men and women) to open up the conversation about this topic and discuss them from a loving space.

And you know, let’s step into a space of understanding and empathy.

Where we leave our vicious judgements at the door.

Because there is vulnerability involved here.

And if someone opens up to you about their own experience of sexual harassment (whether or not they were the harasser or the victim) it is a courageous step.

A step where we can grow together in through communication,understanding and education.

I am in NO way saying we should enable these kinds of experiences to take place.

I am saying let’s just be completely honest and open about it all.

And also EDUCATE all the babas and kiddos who will turn into grown ups one day, on how to be respectful human beings.

Here’s to the men who in my life who are deeply respectful to us women.
Here’s to being grateful to you guys being in my life.
Here’s to a worldwide shift towards understanding, education and positivity towards this topic.
Here’s to us being together in this.

Photo found on www.unsplash.com

BIG love,

Ashley

Steemit Ashley Kalila.png


Sharing Authentically.png

Authors get paid when people like you upvote their post.
If you enjoyed what you read here, create your account today and start earning FREE STEEM!
Sort Order:  

The a**holes of this world are "made" because they grew up watching it, living it. Men as well as women. The only solution, to fight the problem at its root, is like you say: education, communication, love and care.
Beautiful article filled with optimism and hope.

·

Thank you deary!
Yes exactly.
I am happy that my words expressed what I deeply felt inside :)

great blog, your blog is be mentioned in or 'the lions legion daily report'

I too have had a lot of feelings arise with the me-too wave sweeping the world. It's magnificent and essential and far overdue for everyone to see that most women if not all have experienced some kind of harassment ranging from the extreme to less extreme but notable. Misogyny is the unspoken epidemic of our society and it IS time it's recognized!!

Yet simultaneously, it's been very hard to face all of this which has of course unearthed all of my personal experiences that I don't want to think about.

And I too know many amazing men who are part of the solution and thank goodness for them! Thank goodness for all women and men who stand up for each other and are not threatened but instead celebrate each other's power and wellness knowing that when we lift each other up and support each other, we all rise!

·

YESSS!!! :) :) :)

Thank you for expressing yourself.

And I completely know how painful it is to have to face the shit, but apparently it was time to dive deep into it!

Good luck with this process ladydear!

·
·

thank you and you too!!

I despise bullies of all kinds. It boils down to idiots convincing themselves that they have authority over others.

·

Well said dear.
Yes.
:)

·
·

I flagged that spammer for ya btw. Spammers are bullies in their own right XD

·
·
·

Thank you mister!
I am still unsure if I should or shouldn't flag people like that.
So your go to method is flag 'em right? :)

·
·
·
·

Well, with a reputation of 10, the clown shows evidence that he does this type of spamming on a regular basis and hasn't learned his lesson, so that's my reason.

Secondarily, it's total nonsensical b.s. to post that gif here...

Finally, I always check a spammer's SP to make sure if they get mad and start revenge-flagging, I'll be safe. This guy can't harm me. XD Not sure that I'd flag a master spammer with high SP... too much drama and risk of losing rewards.

·
·
·
·
·

@overkillcoin, not only do you need to check the spammer's SP, but also if he or she has a army of bots...

·
·
·
·
·
·

I'm going to get rekt some day, just a matter of time...

·
·
·
·
·

hehe.

Good to know.
I'll keep in mind.

Just realized I learn a new thing everyday on here :)
This was my new lesson for today hihi thanks to you!

prachtig, mijn ex gebruikte zo een cup en dank zij haar heb ik de toa leren kennen, misschien we heel interessant voor uw ventje ;) en natuurlik voor jou ook, het is leren om sexuele energie te sturen, wat een openbaring voor mij, ik begrijp u zeker dat er veel mannen compleet gefrustreerd lopen door dat zij niet leren goed om te gaan met die sterke kracht en eigenlijk aan voortplanting sex doen in plaats van transformatie sex, pas op ik sta zelf nog in mijn kinderschoenen, maar mijn porno fixatie is weg ojeee dat is echte vrijheid man man. sterke post! respect.

·

Mooi!

Dank je wel voor je lieve woorden

nice post, im so interested, I've given upvote :)

·

Did you even read it at all... XD

·
·
·
·

i got it what u means, you explain that many sexual predators are roaming in this world, and you are telling with what you see and I like the writing that comes from the honesty of the heart as you make

I love you see the good in people and the bright side of life>:D<

·

thank you :)

we all are walking toward the same direction, which death... and I think the best way is we know exactly what we want to leave when we are gone... beautiful post.

·

The movement didn't create any fear feelings for me, like the one you describe but it did make me feel sad when I saw on social media how many friends of mine or women I know had similar experiences (including me) :/

·

yea exactly!!

The Dalai Lama - “The World Will Be Saved By the Western Woman”

I grew up with two sisters and no dad, so I guess I am lucky that I have never been much of a manly man and really enjoy the company of women.

Your story resonates with me deeply though. We are a collective consciousness and it stands to reason that you would feel the pain of these women.

Better to focus on the happy feeling and know that there are many fine men out there. I have been lucky to meet many of them on my travels :)

·

Exactly.
After diving deep into the collective pain, I think it is time to look at the positive.
Honestly, it is SO mega important for the women of the world to see 'good' men.
We are inundated with stories and experiences that put men in a bad light.
It is definitely time to turn that around.

Thank you for being here @samstonehill :)
Thank you for being an emotionally-in touch man!