I’ve been all upended recently and I firmly blame the arrival of my midlife crisis. I blame the the arrival of my 40th year in a few weeks time.

I’ve felt this coming for some time after being made redundant in October 2016. Until that point I was mostly on top of my game, had clear professional ambitions and was in a company that was supporting them. Since then I started a new career at the bottom and am finding it increasingly frustrating. This impacts my drive and then quality I fear. That with stupid hours leaves me questioning everything at the moment. Firmly stuck in that big ol’ rut. It’s amazing how that then feeds into your personal drive.

I’ve a week off now and I hope it helps me reboot and see the wood for the trees. I need to feel some purpose outside of paying bills and being a daddy. Not a dress rehearsal and all that.