Who the heck is that Diedrick Z guy, anyway?

(I come in peace, earthlings)

:P

No really though, who is Diedrick Z?!?

For starters, that's me (not the picture, that's Neil Degrasse Tyson a.k.a Jeebus)
And I am 25 years young, figuring things out. I've got some wins and I've got some losses... But going forward my only intent is not to compete for my place in the world...

But to DOMINATE my arena.

I've always been that guy, the one who dominates whatever it is he does. The one who is NEVER satisfied, always thirsty for more.

For as long as I can remember, I've always played the game of life to destroy the competition. Always looking for that competitive edge. Some random snapshots of "accolades" to give you an idea of what I mean:
-At 9 years old I had my art hanging in local coffee shops
-At 13 I won $1,000 as junior volunteer at a childrens' hospital
-I held multiple lifting records at my school
-Placed in the top 1% of my class
-In all AP and college level classes
-Won a 4 year Army ROTC scholarship to the prestigious Howard University
-Was Cadet of the year multiple years
-Was granted a position in Airborne, Air Assault, and Combat Diver Schools
-The list goes on...

Things seemed to be...well to be quite frank, fucking perfect!

I had a beautiful girlfriend of three years, I was going to graduate a prestigious University with a degree in Chemical Engineering and be Commissioned into the U.S Army as a Second Lieutenant all while being debt free and guaranteed a job in the Army as an officer for at least the next 8 years...

It was truly a full living out of the AMERICAN DREAM... :)
...Right?

FUCKING WRONG.

Yes, everything WAS going perfect...

then BAM!!!...

One day, something hits me... I couldn't quite grasp what it was or why I just started to feel...Off...

I sunk into a depressive state, I started experiencing crippling anxiety... The kind of anxiety that wont even let you answer a text without over-analyzing every word you type...

I stopped going to my classes. Started showing up late to my PT and Military Science obligations... (MY passion at the time, mind you)...

What the heck was going on?

...I slowly realized, the life I was living was not mine... It was the life of all the voices over the years... you know, THOSE voices... the ones of societal pressure and NORMS...

"get good grades"

"Go to a good school"

"Pay off your debt"

"Get a Degree... a secure Job... a House... Family...blah, blah, BLAH"

ENOUGH!!! Is how I felt... I finally knew what was wrong, but I didn't know how to fix it...

So I did what every other rational 21 year old college kid in the Army would do...

I. Threw. It. ALL... away...

All of it.

My scholarship? I resigned from ROTC.
My degree? I left Howard University.
House, Career, Family?

I stopped talking to my family out of fear and shame of the changes I was making; I decided to move in with my girlfriend and committed to figuring out this damn thing called life on our own...

Well... what really ended up happening was a series of deeper depression, taking on $120K in debt, no job, no degree, no "skills"... and no support from family in the way I needed it.

It was a nightmare. A beautiful nightmare, however...

You see... from that deep, dark, lost and confused place... came the need to figure it out...

That need has been evolving, growing, and learning for 4 years now and finally it is starting to take real shape...

And let me be the first to tell you, WITH PRIDE, that I wouldnt change a single damn thing if I could. I am only the man who I am today because of the choices I made yesterday...

And now?
Now I am here to share with you what I have learned from failures and mistakes I've made so far... And I am here to share with you the journey and hustle of my day-to-day grind going forward into my self-made lifestyle...

So...

Here is to the Pursuit of Happiness, success, and freedom in life!

Let's get it!