"I Want It How You Want It"

Earlier today, I thought of cutting my hair short again because it was getting hard to manage now that it's getting long. It takes so much time to detangle and actually takes me 15-20 minutes inside the bathroom just to "reset" the curls.

I told my boyfriend I want to cut it short again. This kinda short:

I expected him to say "No."

But instead, the words that I heard from him was "Do it."

I was surprised. "I thought you want my hair long?"

"I want it how u want it", he said.

My heart melt.

And for the first time, I felt appreciated for who I am.

---

Ever since I was a kid, I was always told to not do this and not do that because it doesn't suit me. I've always had issues with my hair mainly because having curly hair in my country means that you are ugly and you should just straighten your hair because it will make you beautiful.

Of course, I wanted to straighten it to conform to what the society says but didn't actually do it because of maintenance and such. Thankfully, I didn't.

From a kid to a teenager, I've always put my hair in a ponytail or braids to fix it, prevent it from being all bulky and volumish.

After finishing high school, I've had the freedom to dye it with whatever color that I want because they don't allow it in high school. I started doing highlights, bleach, but I only dye it with the acceptable colors. The natural-looking colors.

_{Me when I was 17, having orange hair. Shot by Charles.}

It wasn't a complete freedom, of course. I had my parents and ex-boyfriend (thank goodness he's already an ex) telling me that it won't suit me. I would just look like a clown. Obviously, I didn't listen. Well, kinda. Yeah, I did. Well, I wanted the very orange, the Hayley Williams orange. But in order to suit their standards, I didn't bleach it and just dye it with the normal dye instead. So it wasn't the orange that I wanted.

I wanted my hair to be pink. I've always wanted it.

Always.

But I never did because my ex-boyfriend always said that it won't suit me and I would look ugly with it. I would look funny.

It went on for years and I didn't dye my hair because of that.

Years after, I realized I was with a vampire so I broke it up and dyed my hair. Boy was I euphoric.

I was clearly happy with how it turned out. I looked awesome. Pretty. Amazing. No amount of "It doesn't suit you" would change how I feel about it. I knew I made the right decision.

Months after that, I met an amazing daddy man.

Because of him, I realized I've been letting other people dictate what I should do for so long that it nearly destroyed me.

I think this is how it should be.

Your partner supporting you for whatever the hell you want to do with your life.

Someone who will cheer on you.

Someone who will still think you're beautiful even if you go bald.

Someone who will not question your decisions.

Someone who will not set beauty standards for you.

Someone who will not tell you to wear this and that so you'll look "pretty when you're with me".

Someone who will not tell you to stop acting boyish.

Someone who will accept you for who you are and what you do.

Someone who makes your happiness his priority.

I'm happy I'm with that type of man now. :p

"I want it how u want it"

_{I'm grateful, love, that I made a post about it. :p}