Solitude, NOT lonliness - A boon NOT a bane….Please share your experiences/views Steemians
Loneliness expresses the pain of being alone and solitude expresses the glory of being alone. -Paul Tillich
Loneliness or Solitude? A chain of thoughts triggered by this solitary Kingfisher in fading daylight… Captured with Nikon P900 camera
How we perceive it depends on the phase of life we are in. There are phases in life when we are all alone - no one close to us physically and metaphorically.
When we are successful -
They say it is very lonely at the top. No one is a true friend perhaps. There is always that nagging doubt in the mind about people who try to befriend us. Are these true friends or a hoard of sycophants, trying to befriend us just for material gains out of the relationship? Unfortunately, there is no golden rule that helps us decide.
In these circumstances, solitude is our best friend. Speaking of myself - I leverage the solitude to sit there, on the top of the world, and reflect upon my humble beginnings and rejoice in the memories of those little joys of life that I used to cherish. A warm hug by my first love, my first drawing, my bicycle, those moments with my parents, the day my son held my finger in his tiny little hand..... Helps to keep my feet on ground and puts a smile on my lips.
When we fail -
No one wants to be our friend. There are no takers to share failure. Left to our own devices, licking our wounds from the harsh skirmish with life, we tend to draw ourselves into a cocoon. Self-inflicted loneliness!! To turn this loneliness into solitude takes a lot of strength of character. Those who do, bounce back and apply themselves to winning in life with all vigour. However, it is not an easy task. I, personally, have been in situations where the every deepening spiral of negative thoughts menacingly drew me in when I was alone. Thankfully, there is always someone, a source of strength upon which we can draw. For some, this is a wife/girlfriend or faithful companion. For others, this source of strength is a true friend. For still others, this source of strength is God or religion. Irrespective of the source of strength, the trick is to use that strength to turn the loneliness into a period of solitude and build our strength back to the point of breaking out of the cocoon.
I would love to hear your experiences and how you turned your loneliness into strengthening solitude! Please comment and share your story to inspire Steemians.
Image source :
Loney at top - http://www.recruitingroundtable.nl/2013/09/13/flexibilisering-is-it-getting-lonely-at-the-top/
Failiure: https://tinybuddha.com/blog/when-following-your-dreams-results-in-failure-after-failure/
I truly appreciate this post. As someone who has spent quite a lot of time by myself, I know this process of transmutation very well.
I find that it is important to go deep within. There I have found a way to bridge the gap between loneliness and solitude. Allowing the realization to surface that everything and everyone is connected, including myself.
Separation is just an illusion. Like everything else. Truth is we are all one or (al)one.
To echo what you mentioned above, perception is everything.
Thank you. Upvoted. Resteemed.
A very philosophical approach lko2017 - realizing that everyone and everything is interconnected and hence there is neither solitude nor loneliness at any level. Frankly, I am yet to reach that depth of philosophical introspection. Therefore, for myself and many like me, I try to follow the way of reflecting upon my past joyous moments and carry on, renewed with strength of those nuggets of joy. Thank you for your contribution to the discussion and for spreading the message.
Indeed, loneliness i s different from solitude. For those who have put truth about reality at the forefront of life it can cause those who care less for truth to not not like being told about things they don't want to hear about the world. People want to be in their cocoon of belief and positivity. As one walks on the path towards truth, others don't and people go different ways. Seeking truth often leads to solitude, but the care and joy or truth is the companion that can get one through the isolation.
I agree krnel. However, bearing solitude for prolonged periods, with only the strength of seeking truth as companion, takes a real strength of character that many of us do not have, to the necessary extent. The solitude, thus, turns into loneliness again. This is a topic where one has to constantly test ones own character and strength. Thank you for your response and for adding to the wealth of discussion here.
I love being alone, and wish I had more alone time. I have a shop and 8 people at home. But I am patient, I know my time will come.
Yes. However, solitude does not mean we need to be alone. Solitude may also come through isolating a portion of our mind. I know that is not easy with a shot and 8 people but perhaps you can try. :)
No time for loneliness !!!! Enjoy my book in the beach in solitude ;-)
Lol. You are lucky. Please share your tips on how you avoid it!
This is a great perspective, well done! Lonliness is isolation, feeling like something is missing, when you are alone. Solitude is the feeling of completeness when you are alone. It's hard to achieve, but when you learn to feel solitude and enjoy being alone, you have reached a level of self-confidence few have aquired. Following, thanks for sharing!
Thank you so much for your comment. You bring out another valid point about loneliness vs. solitude of the feeling of emptiness vs. completeness. Well done.
Such meaningful discussion is the reason I put up this chain of thought. If you do not mind, please resteem so that the blog and great comments can be seen by many Steemians. Thanks
Interesting thoughts.
In my opinion, all people sometimes need to be alone with themselves. This saves us from the bustle of our world.
But not loneliness. It can break a person. A person is arranged so that he needs to take care of someone, to love someone and to love him.
upvoted & followed
Good luck
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. You are right - a bit of solitude for reflection is always great but one has to guard against that being perceived by ones mind as loneliness at some level.
If you like, please resteem this blog and discussion to spread the message. Thanks for your support.
resteemed
For me, finding an activity that I can lose myself in helps to end the blues of loneliness--physical exercise or a lone trip to the movie theater, etc.
You have stated couple of your sources of strength - in the form of physical exercise which invigorates your body and mind with a sense of achievement and in the form of losing yourself in a make believe world of movies to refresh your mind. Thanks for sharing. Please spread the message of this discussion by resteeming the blog if you like. Thanks for your support.
Loved it gives one your own time for a while to think about what we have to be thankfull for
Good point. Yes we need to learn to reflect on being content with life! Thanks for the reply
Going through a hard moment of what I wouldn't consider solitude but more of intentional loneliness. Can't seem to turn to my friends or family to understand me at the moment. frustrating
Myana - I believe this is exactly the self inflicted loneliness and cocoon I was speaking about. I would recommend reaching out by thinking of how you make a difference to others and involve in the lives of your friends and family - one tiny step at a time. I am no philosopher but this has helped me in the past so I am daring to provide this advice. You will soon see them respond and care about you. All the best. Please feel free to share your thoughts/ experiences after you try one little step TODAY!
Very good post...I hope you make more :)
Thank you very much for the encouragement. Please feel free to spread the message to more Steemians by resteeming. There could be some lonely people out there that may benefit. Thanks
you are welcome :)