HONK

in #life4 years ago

This morning while driving I stopped at a traffic light and looked at my phone.

HONK

Apparently the light turned green without me seeing it, and the car behind me honked their horn. I put my phone away, started going, threw up my hand and said “thanks!”

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How many times do we react otherwise when someone honks at us or says “hey, dude. Wake up?!” How many times have I PERSONALLY responded in similar situations with either anger (fuck you...I’m going when I’m ready!! 🤬🖕🏼) or shame (gasp! I’m so embarrassed I just did that and got yelled at. I am an idiot and screw up all the time! Poor me!! 😫😪) These reactions aren’t limited to traffic light encounters...

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Today neither of those got triggered for my ego! I just automatically, and genuinely, responded by saying “thanks” had a feeling of gratitude, and gave a wave 👋🏽 . Like, really...thanks for helping me out man, and bringing my attention to the fact that the light had changed. 👍🏽👌🏼

What if we could respond that way to other times we are “honked” at in life? What if, when a friend says “hey...I’m concerned about this negative pattern I’ve seen you in often lately....” instead of, “what?! Fuck You! Mind your own business!!” Or “whoa is me! 😩 everyone is against me or doesn’t understand me...” we just said “hey, thanks for alerting me to what you see. Let me look at that for myself and see what’s true.”

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What if we could drop our baggage and stories that we all run around clinging to, and just respond with clarity in the moment to whatever the honk is?

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The ocean looks beautiful in the background! I'm a bit envious at the moment lol

It’s gorgeous all the time. Visit Puerto Rico 🇵🇷!

At least you are not like some of the drivers I see applying make up driving to work. I have had to honk a few times as they are doing their bits up for the office.

I’ve seen that too. 😂 I’m not above that...I’ve been distracted at traffic lights for that reason in the past as well.

That first photo is super cute. You are really photogenic!

Thanks very much 🙏🏽

Recently I really found myself many times reacting with anger, especially in traffic. It's not that I developed it over night, but no matter in what other situations I seem to let go the luggage you are talking about in traffic I don't have patience at all. I guess I have too much espirito latino as a driver. Working on it though...as with other flaws.

In my experience most people have 1 of 3 core emotional tendencies when stressed or triggered. Anger, fear or shame. Sounds like yours is anger, and yes genetics and Latino heritage can contribute muchly to that “passionate” way you’re wired. My man is core anger as well. It gets ugly sometimes, but it often help him get more stuff done than fear or shame types. there are pros and cons to each type.

For consideration in the case of being honked at: that's the only means of communication from vehicle to vehicle. Even more difficult than trying to decipher the tone of a text message!

I love the perspective. Taking CONSTRUCTIVE criticism and using it constructively is a true asset, I couldn't agree more. Hell, sometimes criticisms meant destructively can give insight that we can use to be better people!

Absolutely! There is something to be learned from any feedback. We just have to work to quell our little egos from getting offended into shut down all the time.

That's the trick!

Idk why it's so hard: you'd think more people would realize that it's the ego that makes us get butthurt over every little thing. Since butthurt isn't fun, rein in the ego a bit.

Based on the pictures, I thought this was going to be an article about cat-calling.

What a gorgeous town you live in, though. I'm glad the relaxing atmosphere is carrying over into your reactions to stress.

I am very fortunate at how beautiful it is where I now get to live. Thank you :)

Also, I have no problem with cat calling. My only struggle is people who have a problem with cat calling. 😂

Well written!!!!

This is another great writing. So far I have read, you have insight meaning of your every article. You below wording are real true in our daily life. When someone is helping to correct us, we think he is insulting. We take very less negative comments as positive way.

What if we could respond that way to other times we are “honked” at in life? What if, when a friend says “hey...I’m concerned about this negative pattern I’ve seen you in often lately....” instead of, “what?! Fuck You! Mind your own business!!” Or “whoa is me! 😩 everyone is against me or doesn’t understand me...” we just said “hey, thanks for alerting me to what you see. Let me look at that for myself and see what’s true.”

Thanks for sharing another great article.

Thank you so much for the kind feedback. 🙏🏽

You are most welcome.

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