What I Have Learned In 30 Years

in #life7 years ago (edited)

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Today I turn 30, and as I won't be about later, I wanted to share some of the most important lessons that I have learned on my journey before I disappear for the day. There is so much I wish that I had realised ten years ago, or twenty. So I hope that what I share today can serve as a catalyst, a means of speeding up the growth of any who are willing, as well as ready, to truly hear what I have to say.


  • Hatred is Heavy

There's a lot of hate in the world, and perhaps one could even say there is plenty reason for there to be. But it is a choice whether you want to carry it around with of you. Negative emotions breed negative thoughts, which in turn give birth to negative actions. Then your negative actions provoke the same cycle in another human being.

If we can allow ourselves to remember how to do the more difficult thing-- to forgive, then we will find that it can break the cycle of negativity, lift the weight of hate from our shoulders, and ensure that our journey through life is one that effects the world in a positive way. While it may seem an impossible task to forgive someone who has wronged us or the ones we love, it is recognizing that it is the world we have all played a part in building that has brought out the uglier side of humanity that can provide us with the resolve to do so.

When one can accept that it is the system that is responsible for the way we treat one another, then they are able to transcend the unproductive blaming of fellow-victims and stay focused on the bigger picture. We all are to blame for creating the system, and feeding its growth, so we are all equally to blame for all the suffering that system has since inflicted on the world.

  • Facts are Often Fiction

So many of us know of the deceptions presented to us on a daily basis by the mainstream media, and now much of the alternative media too. But it took me far too long to realise that those same deceptions are in every other part of society. The most important thing one must consider when being introduced to a new "fact," even if it arises from a supposedly reputable scientific source, is, "Why would anyone want me to believe this?"

Science was once about exploring the mysteries of the universe, about experimenting and arriving at conclusions that help us better understand our environment. Now, science has become deeply political, and just as news and media companies can be bought and used to propagate agendas, so too have scientific organisations been bought and used to "discover" information that will make you think in a way that someone very wealthy wants you to think.

I often hear the words "question everything," and they are certainly powerful words. However, most who hear them do not abide by them. They merely question everything that comes from government. But we should be questioning everything, from everywhere, at every time. Only through asking ourselves how the facts we are told can benefit the people who rule this world can we recognize what is closer to the truth, and what is more likely propaganda.

  • Morality is Not Subjective

If what is right and what is wrong is truly subjective, then nothing is right and nothing is wrong. So you have two options. You can choose the nihilistic approach, and believe that nothing is right or wrong, nothing matters, and being good is just an irrelevant and inconsequential choice. Or, you can choose to believe that there is a definitive right and wrong, and that we have had, purposely or otherwise, our sense of morality skewed by our environment.

I believe in the latter. We are led to believe that we need to be taught how to be good, but from my perspective, that appears to be just as backwards as most things in this world. What if it is how to be a bad person that we must learn, and we receive this miseducation through news, tv, movies, music, and the observation of our fellow humans who have suffered the same damaging lessons on how to be a shit human being.

I believe that we all innately understand what is right and what is wrong, because we are all human, and through knowing how we would like to be treated, we should know how to treat others. But through excessive labeling and other divisive habits that we adopt as we grow older in this world, we forget that we are the same and therefore forget how to treat one another.

  • Insecurity is Cultivated in This World, But The Cure is Simple

There are countless mechanisms out there which have been put in place to make you hate yourself. For the most part, this is achieved by tricking you into believing that humans are all adversaries, that you need to be better than everyone else, and that whether you are better or worse is something that is decided by your peers. This is why we are in competition with one another to be smarter, better looking, better dressed, better equipped with the latest smartphones or fastest cars and a million other things. Through believing our value can only be seen through the eyes of others, we find the insecurity that makes us good consumers.

If we could all learn to value ourselves through our own eyes, and to hold ourselves to the standards we created for ourselves, instead of the ones presented to us by a fucked up system, then we will begin to overcome that insecurity and find that we don't need to buy things in order to be a "better" person. We simply need to act according to our own, moral code.

  • Self-reflection is The Only Way To Experience Real Growth

We live busy little lives, running around trying to make money so that we can survive on the planet we were born on. The methods in which we are forced to go about acquiring this money is not always glamorous. On top of that, the adversarial approach to humanity that we are beaten over the head with since birth, leads us to treat each other in awful ways in order to raise our social or economic status. But we do it all anyway, because we need to in order to make our lives more comfortable.

It is no wonder that, when we are living within a system that leads us to act in such ways, that so many of us would not have the time, nor the desire, to look inside ourselves and question whether the decisions we have made are the right ones. No one wants to examine the choices they have made throughout their lives, for then they must invite the guilt that arrives with the recognition of the pain we have all inflicted on others.

But if we can be brave enough to hold ourselves and our choices to scrutiny, then we can learn one of the most valuable traits that a human can possess. Consideration. It is knowing how our previous actions have effected others, and even ourselves, that we are able to consider the right steps to take in future. Steps that will ensure we leave a trail of positivity and gratitude behind us, rather than one of misery and pain. We might also learn how to better treat ourselves, our bodies and our minds.

  • You Are Your Own Messiah

There are so many movies out there, as well as religions, that instill within so many of us the belief that there is one person who is going to come and save humanity from all of its problems. Well if we all believe that, there is no reason for us to try and do anything ourselves. That sounds like a great thing for those who are currently in power.

It is this lack of belief in ourselves that has helped sell the illusion that we are not powerful enough to make the changes we want in the world. We are always waiting for that one person who will bring us all together and unite us in a quest to take back our lives and our liberty. How much longer will we wait though? Until there isn't a world left to save is what I would say, because that person is not coming.

We hold the power to be our own saviours, and until we realise that, we will forever be doomed to watch a system we hate grow more and more powerful. Eventually, we arrive at a place where we really don't have the power to change things, and neither will our phantom-Messiah.

  • Success is Nothing To Do With Money, Power, Or Social Hierarchy

We are conditioned to believe that being successful in life means having more money, more material possessions or having more power over others. But if this is true, why are so many people who have achieved society's definition of success depressed? Well I have come to find that the answer to this question is very simple, they did not achieve success at all.

Success is far more difficult to achieve than the acquisition of paper. One cannot apply for it, and have it given to them after an interview. Success is something you must earn for yourself, by becoming the best human being that you can.

When you are able to look in the mirror and see a person that you can respect, love and who you can genuinely believe is a valuable part of this world we reside in, then-- and only then, will you know success.




These are the most important things I have discovered on my journey through life, and I can honestly say that I am excited to learn more.



One last thing I have learned, and it took me over 25 years, is that birthday's are not about making corporations wealthier by buying one another bullshit that we do not need, and that will only reinforce our erroneous belief that happiness comes from having more things. Birthdays are not about going out clubbing and getting laid, or doing cocaine with your friends. Birthdays ought to be about spending time with the people you came into this world with, and who you have struggled and laughed your way through the years with. Birthdays should be about family, and so I am going to spend time with mine now.


Until tomorrow, my friends.



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Enjoy your birthday...that we share. You are blessed to have learned your lessons so soon. I'm 46 today and a lot of your lessons came to me much later.

Well happy birthday to you too. Were you born on Friday the 13th by any chance?

Yes!!!! 😂 And you?

You lucky fucker! Lol. I missed it by a day. Thursday. Gutted...

I think that would be pretty cool for no reason other than to tell people you were born on Friday the 13th and then act a bit like a murderous psycho to freak them out a little. Could be rather funny.

I'm about to disappear again, probably until tomorrow, so I hope that you too enjoy your birthday and your night.

I LOVE it! I also love the fact that most of my family are born on the 13th of different months. Enjoy the rest of your birthday!

the 13th isn't just mind within my family either.

Thanks a lot, and I did.

And Cake. Birthday's are also about Cake. Unless you're one of those Gluten Spazzers, who gets all windy and complains incessantly about bloating. Then birthdays are all about cardboard-flavoured shite-triangles which are stodgier than a Kim Jong Un Baguette.

Bloating is just the tip of the iceberg, my friend, and you really don't want to know what else... GF doesn't have to be flavourless, hard or stodgy - think of Orange Almond cake with melted chocolate icing (which I made for myself this year), or Flourless Chocolate Cake made with real melted chocolate, eggs and not a lot else. Though I have to admit that the carrot cake I invented a month or so back took stodge to a whole new level. Let's just say I invented carrot pudding. It would have better with custard on top.

🎈Wish you a very Happy Birthday🎈 🎂
Thanks for sharing some important life lessons with us.
I completely agree spending time with the family is the best way one can celebrate Birthday....Have a good one 🍺

Cheers, mate. I am wondering what I might have to share at 35 now. Or if I will still believe the things I wrote today at all.

You've learned a lot for someone 30 years young. These are some powerful lessons. Happy birthday to you, and many wise and wonderful years to come :)

Wise words for a dude just hitting 30. Impressive.
I was an arrogant stoner bumming around SE Asia assuming I knew everything there was know when I hit 30.How wrong I was about almost everything.
Luckily I took the red pill in my mid 30's after 9/11 and started to learn what what really going on. Hopefully you are an example of the next generations willingness to have an open mind and take a stand against the shit that is ruining the world today. Rant over.
Happy Birthday Buddy.

Yeah I think for a lot of us it was 9/11 that forced us to look at things from a new perspective. There's perhaps some comfort in that. I still wish I had started the path I am on a hell of a lot earlier, but if I had, I would have missed out on a lot of lessons. So maybe for us all, are true journey, the one that happens within us, begins only when we are ready for it.

Thanks a lot for the kind words and I will do my best to have a great day. Typically, I have a great day every day, so I am sure I will not let you down on that one.

Everyone who wakes up has a different story, it's not important when you wake up as long as when you do you try to pay it forward by waking others.
I wouldn't change a thing I've done in my life, the experiences both good and bad make you who you are. Have a great one buddy.

Yes, this very sentiment is echoed in a comment of mine below.

Thanks a lot, and I did.

Awesome post, man.

I feel like I share so many thoughts with you as I've been reading your posts and comments lately. Glad to have Steemians like yourself. Happy Birthday!

Thanks, man. And I feel the same based on the recent correspondence I have had with you. I always knew there was some like-minded people on here, but it's been getting very difficult to find them recently now that they're becoming the minority.

Happy Birthday! Damn, you know a lot more at 30 than I did. Didn't really start getting my shit together until around 35. I hope this article finds those who need it. Glad you're spending your day with family.

Thank you. And, many of us never get our shit together at all, or even think any thoughts that were not given to us, so what time you started doesn't matter at all. It's that you did that counts.

Very wise for someone so young. Looking back I was totally dumb when I was your age. You know you're doing it right when you're surrounded by people you love. This is what makes you happy, not a career, not money. Happy birthday!

Yes I agree, though, not just people. Vito too.




Thanks a lot for the kind words and for the birthday wishes.

Hello, Vito!
Looks like a really nice dog!

And even when we've already learned these lessons it's sometimes hard to not sink in the superficiality of today's society... Happy birthday!

You're so right. I really should have added that you need to be mindful and make sure that you recognize whenever you are beginning to fall back into one of the negative cycles I mentioned. But, I suppose that just falls under self-reflection.

Thanks a lot, mate. I almost certainly will.

Happy birthday and kudos for your insights.

Thanks. Hopefully there will be more to discover and share in the coming years.

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