What You Say vs What You Actually Want To Say

in #life6 years ago

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Wasn’t childhood just great? You had absolutely no care in the world and were free to do whatever you liked and most probably got away with it just because ‘you were a child’.

But really, it is indeed one of the most enjoyable periods of life where you don’t have any of the life’s mountainous burdens of responsibilities apart from having to go to school and learning and memorising a bunch of things, that is, which seemed too burdensome at the time to be fair.

Boy, were we so wrong! As you grow older, you start learning more about the world around you and realise that it is so different than what you had thought it would be as a child.

You have to behave according to different circumstances, places, people and situations and although your mind thinks of a hundred different things, you have to choose carefully what you let out of your mouth, especially in a PC (politically correct) world like ours. Today I want to talk about some of those situations, where we say something but want to say something else entirely!


When someone takes 10 minutes to talk about how their day was.

What You Say: Oh, that was a lot of stuff to do in one day!

What You Want To Say: I don’t caaaare!!! I asked you how your day was just to be polite and start a conversation… If I wanted a whole speech about every single thing that happened throughout the day, I would have simply asked my wife! Oh look, you’re still talking. That’s absolutely great. Why don’t you jam my head inside this shredder while you’re at it!


When an interviewer asks, “So, why do you want to work here?”

What You Say: I really care about the work that this company does and I believe in its goals to make people’s lives better. I want to be a part of that journey and I am hoping this will help me grow as a person and as a professional in the process.

What You Want To Say: You see, I have always been passionate about not dying of starvation. For that, I need money and for that, I need a job. So, it is pretty straightforward actually!


When Your Crush Says Hi!

What You Say: Hey! How’s it going?

What You Want To Say: Hi there, you perfect creation of god, the hallmark of beauty, the daylight of my life and the purest of souls. What can I do for you? Just say it and it shall be done!!


When Asking Someone Out On A Date

What You Want To Say: Hey do you wanna grab a coffee sometime?

What You Say: Hey! Umm, Smith….John Smith, my name is. Coffee… you drink? It’s great. I hear it has great antioxidant properties umm, so you should really drink it, you know. With me. Will you though?


When Someone Suggests A Real Stupid Idea In A Meeting

What You Say: Let’s get back to that later.

What You Want To Say: Woah!! I haven’t heard an idea that stupid since they decided to cancel Friends! I mean do you just blurt words out? Oh wait, are you high again, Charles? Come on man! It’s the 5th time ……. this week!!


When Someone Apologises To You, But Doesn’t Mean It

What You Say: It’s ok. No problem at all. :)

What You Want To Say: (imitating their apology with a frustrated face) Aaamm sowwyyyyyyy. Yeah right!!! And I’m Iron freaking Man!!!


When you have headphones on and someone keeps trying to talk to you

What You Say: Oh!….Yes….Right…..Tell me about it!…..mm hmm, that’s right….

What You Want To Say: Excuse me kind sir, but this device you witness in front of you is called a ‘headphone’. It’s a wonderful piece of technology that lets you experience music in all its glory. You know what the best part is though? It won’t let me listen to the 40 years of wisdom that you are so eager to pour into me, a total stranger, as I am not able to hear your voice while I have this apparatus on. Good day!

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These are all funny but the absolute best were,

"I have always been passionate about not dying of starvation." and the piece about the headphones. Seriously if someone can't take the hint that you are wearing headphones to avoid talking to them, there is only one recourse: punching. Lots and lost of punching.But if you did that you'd end up on another job interview in an attempt to fulfill your passion of not starving.

Well played sir!

hahaha thanks!! It means a lot coming from you :D

Well you can rest assured that when you enter senility you are given a golden ticket to swear at children, soil yourself and intermittently tell people to go fuck themselves. And you'll get less hassle for it than when you were a child.

haha at least something to look forward to old age!! :P

I'd kindly suggest we as adults are wrong. The kids' perspective seems more truthful, more honest, more open and more fun.

I find myself saying the bluntest things to whatever person, as long as it's accompanied with a kind smile it seems you can say anything!

The people around me are all like: "Oh, that's just Fitz, he's like that..."

Being an adult but still behaving like a kid feels great, highly recommended!

I completely agree. Be an adult but have some childish qualities as well.

I wish I was a child to enjoy my life without any types of responsibilities

We can only act like one now
Nice article

Sarcasm is the second language I speak every day 😆

This job interview part is funny. .. but so true😁
Sometimes it's not easy to control your own mouth..

haha me too! Some of my favourite TV characters are the more sarcastic ones like Chandler from FRIENDS.

I think George in a Seinfeld episode tried that out one time..just saying like it is...I think it worked for 3/4 of the episode...

What did he try again?

Don't fake listening if you don't really want to because people can sense when you are not being real. I let people know when if i can't stay and listen. i think its better.

Trust me some people can't sense it ;)

if we have 100% in our minds about what we want to say, we only says 10%
that's mean we drop 90% just from the brain to mouth

that's interesting!

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