These are all funny but the absolute best were,

"I have always been passionate about not dying of starvation." and the piece about the headphones. Seriously if someone can't take the hint that you are wearing headphones to avoid talking to them, there is only one recourse: punching. Lots and lost of punching.But if you did that you'd end up on another job interview in an attempt to fulfill your passion of not starving.

Well played sir!