You Gotta Ask for What You Want!
I am learning to receive the abundance that Universe gives to me; whether through people, nature or situations.
When I was a child, my late dad told me that we are poor, therefore we don't ask from others and we don't take from others. He didn't even want me to accept a scholarship. I don't blame him. He had his own conditioning. And me... I grew up doing exactly that. Not just I don't ask, I reluctant to take from others as well, especially when it comes to big gifts, even when I deserve it.
Until recently, I've been told by a friend that I need to learn to ask. It is a form of honouring my own need and a healing for my trauma. According to her, I shall start with small stuff and it's okay to be rejected. As long as I ask, I am honouring my healing process. Then I realised, I've been getting the same messages from others all these years: "You gotta ask for what you want".
So, this is what happens tonight. I looked at my favourite chocolate, and I want it. A friend who stood next to me asked me: "Do you want it?". After battling with my feeling of unworthiness, I consciously said: "Yes I want it". She then bought it for me as a gift after three hours of chill-out coaching session.
I Am Grateful.
Blessing to you all.
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I am the same- I have a difficult time asking. I have been a single mother for so long that I rarely have anything for myself-everything goes to the boys <3
But, I have come to a point where I am actively allowing myself to accept help. It is a leaning process lol! But it does get easier :)
@arbitrarykitten do you know what I just realised? I'm in the business of guiding others. To do so, first I would need them to ask for help, otherwise, I can't give any guidance or support. When I didn't ask for people and people do the same. Everyone is shutting the door from asking. Make sense? I love your perspective on your process. It does get easier. I need to practice more. Let see what I'm going to ask for :)
That makes perfect sense. How can you give something without allowing yourself to accept? And how can you know how to help people lean how to overcome when you do not know how to do it yourself?
:)
Exactly!. I remember something about Law of give and and take; everything must be balanced. Therefore, to take correctly, we must ask, so the giver (whether it is a person or Universe) know exactly what we want. I'm feeling satisfied to have this conversation with you :)
simple and sweet .. dark chocolate is great and I am thankful you received it..
for me receiving is harder than giving .. I am learning too
Thank you Rebecca, let your journey be smooth!
Hi @roselifecoach, I can totally relate to your position, because I, too, have issues asking for help. Call it ego, call it independence, call I competency building, sometimes rather than trying to pin a word to it, it's better if we just open our mouth and ask.
I wrote about this a while back. Hope it helps.
https://steemit.com/psychology/@maverickfoo/mini-motivation-67-it-s-ok-to-withdraw-from-your-network
Great article @maverickfoo, couldn't agreed more that we too need a break some times.
I guess we are all condition since child to not show our weakness, thus the result is not knowing to ask help when we are adult. Awareness, and also some good friends to slap you once a while! Hahaha
"This is a form of honoring my own need..."
Yes. I used to have the same symptoms like you too. It took me years to understand that its not wrong to honor our real needs. We can only be wholesome (be our healthy self) when we acknowledge our needs, see ourselves as worthy and dare to ask and receive. Bless you @roselifecoach! :)
Blessing to you too @michelleloh168. I am glad you found your voice in this matter. I am still learning the greatness of this.
Wowww i like your post
Thank you!
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