Vengalov!! I can totally feel you. It's impossible to describe, but yet real. I experienced psychosis few years ago. I lost my mental barriers and I was no longer in control of all the dangerous human characteristics that we possess. I had to learn to forgive and accept our sinfulness and move on. It took time and it was a long fight (forgivness and acceptance is difficult). Though it was a huge spiritual awekening to slowly realize and come back to myself. I saw it as an opportunity, and not a curse. Goodness win.